The Demands Of The World

When I was in fourth grade, my class had a talent show. I had no talent of my own, so I glommed on to the talents of others. There was a really funny kid named Michael Fee who allowed me to play straight man to his comedy act. We rocked. And then there were the black kids in the school who really loved the latest Michael Jackson album -Off The Wall. They did a dance number, and I danced with them. They thought it was cool that the white boy wanted to learn to dance. Dwight was the official cool kid of the school and when he said I could dance with them, that was great. In some parts of the country, even at the time, I would have been accused of all sorts of terrible things and told that people from different races didn't mix together. I didn't know any different. That was just the way I was raised and just the way I have always lived.

My belief in the equality of all people didn't end at the outside of people's skins, or their genders, or nationalities, but went deeper. I could never swallow the message from the Bible that the only way to God was through Jesus Christ. To tell you the truth, I'm still not quite sure I believe it now. We all have our wedges that drive us from the church and truth be told, this was mine. I just couldn't believe that my idea of equality was greater than God's own - that a perfectly righteous individual in all other ways wouldn't be acceptable to God just because he was a Jew, or a Muslim, or an Odin worshipper. I didn't really stray from God and the church so much as I went out into the world to find answers.

I have chronicled in the past some of the steps in that process, but I believe that when you really have an issue that you can't resolve, God throws that issue right in your face - in this case, quite literally.

Our new choir bass is orthodox Jew. This is not common knowledge in my church and not even in my choir. I found out, really, because I overheard something and because he sits next to me in the choir. He is a phenomenal singer and someday will be singing at a concert hall near you. But for now, he trades space to practice with his choral group in exchange for appearing in our choir on Sundays.

I noticed, at first, that our new bass never read the liturgies out loud with other people. He has a fine voice, so I knew it wasn't a physical reason. I suspected that he must come from a more conservative background and didn't speak liturgies in his church. So, though it bothered me a little, I just let it go - not wanting to press the issue. But then, one day, during the passing of Christ's peace when I turned to him and shook his hand and said, "The Peace of Christ be with you," he gave me a pained expression and just said, "Thank you." A week later, I was walking down the hall and I heard the Pastor asking our new bass about his father's job as an orthodox rabbi and then I put two and two together.

Now, on Sunday's, I tell him, "Peace be with you," and he smiles at me because he knows that I know. I made him feel more comfortable in choir, no longer sneaking furtive glances at him to see why he wasn't saying the Lord's prayer or reading the litany. I allow him to be a weekly visitor and not a participant, and that is acceptable to him.

But I'd been wondering now for some time what my duties were in relationship to this bass. That here was an opportunity to preach and speak about the love of Christ to someone that I knew was not a Christian - a chance to save someone. All of the issues resurfaced in my head. Did I have a right? Did it even make a difference? Was I being tested? Should I at least offer Christ - like He was some sort of cookie or cup of coffee? I realized how silly the whole line of questioning was because quite frankly if he wasn't getting enough Christ through the liturgy and the music and the whole service, then my offering him Christ wasn't going to tip the scales. I often think of this whole idea of evangelism and I just get confused and scared.

St. Paul founded a church in Corinth - a city much like San Francisco with a cross cut of the entire civilized world passing through its streets on a daily basis. The people of this church, and of this community, were no doubt faced with the same plethora of choices and ideas that we are faced with today. There was probably no religion they didn't know about. No idea or politic that hadn't been discussed in their streets and markets and places of worship. In such a city, a church of Jesus Christ would find fertile ground to grow. But what of the thousands of other people who lived in this city? What was to become of the Romans? Or the Phonecians? Or the Jews? Or the Greeks? What was to become of the rest of God's kingdom? Imagine yourself a Jew of the time - raised your whole life to believe that you were one of God's chosen people and someone comes up to you and says, "Oh, by the way, the plan's changed - now you have to follow Jesus Christ, the son of God." Is that not, in essence, what we are asking people of other beliefs even today? "Sorry, Vishnu is not real. The only way to everlasting life is through Jesus - and don't even think about reincarnation."

But St. Paul provided me with the answers God had been leading me to for years. He knew what words to put in my head, to make me understand what I couldn't quite grasp - to make me understand what other people thought when confronted with Jesus Christ.

18For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. 19For it is written:
"I will destroy the wisdom of the wise;
the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate."[c]
20Where is the wise man? Where is the scholar? Where is the philosopher of this age? Has not God made foolish the wisdom of the world? 21For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe. 22Jews demand miraculous signs and Greeks look for wisdom, 23but we preach Christ crucified: a stumbling block to Jews and foolishness to Gentiles, 24but to those whom God has called, both Jews and Greeks, Christ the power of God and the wisdom of God. 25For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength.

1 Corinthians 18-25

Your God died on a cross? And He is almighty and all powerful and all knowing? Couldn't He see that coming? And you say that He was in Heaven at the same time that He was being crucified? This is whom I must believe in to make it into Heaven in your religion? Okay... I'll get back to you on that.

The Cross is foolishness to those who don't believe. It is as crazy to them as Mohammed riding up in a chariot or Buddha battling Vishnu or Jesus preaching to Native Americans. It is utterly ridiculous to those who don't believe. Jews and Greeks and Norsemen and Romans and atheists are all seeking their own version of the truth. They want something that justifies their laws and their prophets. But to believe in Christ is to believe that we are not significant beings, that we are nothing, that to become great, one must become weak. We believe in the very things that other religions preach against. We are not better than them, but we offer the only possible way for truth, justice, and beauty to survive on this ugly, evil, and false world. For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's greatest wisdom and the weakness of God is greater than the strength of man's greatest power.

There is no short cut in religion. There is only the long path to finding the ultimate truth. My path started with the Presbyterian version of Christianity. It has led me out into the world and caused me to seek wisdom and knowledge. The more wisdom and knowledge I gain, the more my path becomes secure and the road I'm on becomes a little clearer to see. All of these people I pass along the way are on my path seeking their own things. Ultimately, God will reveal His truth to them and they will have to decide to accept it or not accept it. What their fate will be, I do not know - only God knows. What my role is in revealing that truth to them, I do not know. God has yet to reveal that to me.

The world is a wonderfully diverse place. We all see things in so many different ways, and yet, we are all so much the same. Even in our deepest convictions, we react the same - embracing deeply that which we know and believe, and discarding the other's beliefs as utter foolishness. I recognize this now that what I had once taken for contempt for other beliefs, is actually only a difference of opinion. Its okay for me to believe what I believe and to share that with others because I am not trying to sway them away from their beliefs, but to share my own. And when the conviction of my message reaches their heart, God willing, they will take that message to heart and agree to meet with my good friend, Jesus, even if just for a cup of coffee and a cookie. And then, may the best religion win.

The Restraining Order

23"Everything is permissible"—but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible"—but not everything is constructive. 24Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others. 1st Corinthians 10: 23-24

I have yet to see the controversial footage, but I hear its bad and I want to get out my review ahead of time. Though I know not the content, I am sure that it is a perversion of the Gospels truth and I want you to boycott the viewing of the new video blog release on Andy's Blog A Mile From The Beach.

Many years ago, or so the story goes, there was a secret society called The Lakeside Youth Group and they were in charge of keeping a well kept secret hidden from the world - a secret so damaging to World History that just knowing it would give you nightmares for weeks. For some horrid reason, this secret was made into a slide show and then filmed. But the film remained hidden for many years, locked in a dusty vault, safe and secure behind a forbidding code that only the wisest and bravest person could ever crack. A couple of months ago, that code was broken and this video resurfaced to the light of day.

Though I pleaded with Andy, he has seen fit to remaster this video as a digital stream to post on his brand new video blog. Though the College of Cardinals asked Andy nicely not to place this video blog on his website, he will soon do so. Though the Pope himself has pointed to the knowledge that can be viewed on this video and said that it is yet another sign of the apocalypse, Andy has shown a rather devil may care attitude with the second coming and thrown caution to the wind. First, Paris Hilton as Mother Theresa and now this!

I urge you to stay away. As the apostle Paul wrote centuries ago, surely forseeing this very day and this very situation, "not everything is beneficial." If you value your soul, do not watch his video blog.

Oh. And did I mention that it's really long to download?

Though I warned you dear reader, if you still feel compelled, Andy will be posting a video of our 1986 Work Camp Slide Show featuring Andy and myself - when we thought we were cool (before we knew better). I beseech thee one last time, SAVE YOURSELF! Go knit or something! Do not go to A Mile From The Beach and access Andy's Video Blog. Do not download the video and watch it. Do not post comments on Andy's blog telling him how much you liked it. Because YOU WILL SEE MORE! DO NOT ENCOURAGE HIM! HE IS ARMED AND DANGEROUS WITH THE PAST!

You are warned.

Days of Future Perfect - Day Ten

Unfortunately, this is where the future posts run out. My RSS server discovered its error after a neat and tidy ten posts from the future arrived and then went back to normal. This post is dated from September 17th, 2006 and concerns the long road home to San Francisco. I've had fun letting you read about the future, but now its time to get back to more serious pursuits.

Saying Goodbye

The end of a vacation is always a bummer, and yet necessary for our continued well being. If you've ever been on a vacation that has gone too long (and we all have) then you know exactly what I mean. Eventually the body, mind, and spirit begin to atrophy from constant pampering and need to be tempered again with hard work. I could probably get used to this life, but I wouldn't be half of what I am now if I did.

I was awakened this morning by the familiar tune of When The Saints Go Marching In on my cell phone. I was still groggy when I opened the phone and saw that the call came from the 707 area code and I was trying to figure out who the heck I knew in the 707 area code, or for that matter, where the 707 area code was located. Then I remembered that 707 was local and I immediately answered the phone.

"Hello?" I said, eagerly.

"Hello, Will," answered Celeste. "Did I wake you?"

"No, I was just about to go out for breakfast," I lied.

"I was wondering if you wanted to go to church with me this morning," she asked.

"Church?" My Mom and brother were giving me strange looks, "I'm leaving this afternoon."

"I'll have you back by lunch," she said.

So, to make a long story short, my morning was spent in a local church in the Orlando area (Baptist, naturally) and I got to meet all of Celeste's friends and Pastor and church ladies and they were all very happy to meet me. Afterwards, as we were driving back, I couldn't help but smiling.

"What?" she asked.

"I feel like I've passed some sort of test," I replied.

She didn't say anything, but she gave me a secret smile. We reached the hotel and went for a walk in the woods and... well, none of your business... and then it became time for me to grab my stuff and get the heck out of Dodge. We kissed goodbye one last time and promised to stay in touch and then... we said goodbye.

Goodbyes are hard. We know in our hearts we will see someone or something again, but we feel as if everything will be different when we do - and of course, it will be. Nobody and no thing stands still. I watched Celeste get into her car and drive away and I had the urge to chuck it all and run after her, but this is real life and not a Hollywood movie.

We gathered together as a family once more and carried our bags down into the lobby and checked them with the porter and then we went to a nice leisurely lunch one last time at the Whispering Canyon Cafe. The kids had fun running around and eating and we adults tried to absorb as much last second ambience to last us another four years until the next trip. But all too soon, our van arrived and we said goodbye to the Wilderness Lodge one more time.

The trip to the airport was uneventful. We reached the Orlando International Airport in plenty of time, checked on to the flight and headed for the security line. I was just about to dread getting culled for a strip search when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I turned around to see Celeste standing there.

"You didn't come after me," she said.

"I wanted to," I replied. "But I didn't have a car."

"They have rentals."

"I don't know where you live."

"We could remedy that."

And so, since this is my blog and I can end it any way I want, my family flew home. I changed my reservation until next week and plan to spend the rest of the week getting to know Celeste a little better. And my agent called and said that they had a bid for my novel in the 7 figure range. Sure. It could happen. And its infinitely better than saying that I flew home with my family, arrived home tired and sad, and decided to write this blog quickly before I went to bed. But, alas, it wouldn't be true.

Goodbye's are also about learning to accept that you don't always get things the way you want them - but that doesn't necessarily mean its bad.

So I finish up this post here at home in San Francisco, having spent the entire flight day dreaming about what I should have done about Celeste, but having thoroughly enjoyed my time at WDW. Andy called me to tell me that the pilot deal fell through once they read the story treatment that I'd sent him. They really didn't like the title of the pilot, "The Burning Bush" - thought it was too religious. In the meantime, however, I have signed on with Ken Burns to write the narrative portions of the new Ariel researched documentary on C.S Lewis, The Early Years. I was also happy to hear from Dan that he has given up his capitalist ways and joined a Spokane area commune for computer enthusiasts. So much mail to catch up with. Thanks Sue for sending me that e-book version of the Kama Sutra to my laptop in Orlando - I won't tell you if it helped or not.

That being said, its time to get back to the serious work of my life... which now that my novel is finished, my vacation is over, and I have a girlfriend, is nothing short of...

Sorry, the last couple of words got cut off by the RSS feed. I'm not quite sure where I was going with this blog anyway. But that's it for the future. From now on, I'm firmly posting only things of current events and the recent past. Too confusing otherwise. See you all on Monday.

Friday's Obligatory Blogagory

Today's Category Is:

Name Three Ways Celeste's Story Should End Up? (I.E. Celeste should win the lottery, move to the South of France, and never see Will again... ;)

Days of Future Perfect - Day Nine

And so we come near the end of these future posts, this one dated from September 16th, 2006. And quite frankly, this one could be potentially embarassing - certainly hurting my chances of ever running for President in the midwest ;)

Princess For A Day

They say that your sexuality is a spectrum - nobody is 100% male or 100% female. We all fall somewhere in between with masculine bits and feminine bits, like women who love football or men who love soap operas. Given that these people obviously think about this stuff too much, I still can't deny a secret place in my heart that has always wanted to be a Princess For A Day.

Now, don't go reading into this any more than is already out there. I've already destroyed my chances of being elected to any office in Utah. I'm going for the whole ball of wax now - frontrunner for Supervisor of San Francisco. I don't mean I want to go pick out a frilly pink dress, wear a tiara, and have high tea with the Queen. I mean that I love Disney Princess movies (and we all know how bland Prince Charming is) and I love stories like The Little Princess and Anne of Green Gables (Ouch, really outed myself there). To me they are a guilty pleasure. I'd much rather watch The Little Mermaid for the 500th time than see another boring version of Tom Sawyer.

Which doesn't mean I'm not a Bond man, and don't aspire to the Indiana Jones toughness or swagger of John Wayne. It just means that there's a soft spot in my heart for singing princesses with talking mice friends and schemes to find true love. What's wrong with that? Maybe I'm just a romantic.

This morning, I got to live out my dream and become a Princess for a Day. Oh sure, I had a proxy - my 18 month old niece, Natalie. But really, this day was all about me!

First thing in the morning, I had room service deliver breakfast in bed to all and sent over a very special tool for Natalie to use on her Disney/TAC Day - a Fairy Wand. I also sent one to my sister and my Mom. After breakfast, when we were all dressed, we left the rest of the men to slumber in bear-like hibernating peace, and we headed out for Downtown Disney's Mega World Of Disney Store. Our first stop of the day was shopping.

We each picked out a tiara (I got a gender neutral hat) and Natalie selected a frilly pink princess dress, which she wore right out of the store. Now dressed in her princess dress, tiara, and carrying her wand, we were ready for the next stop on our journey - breakfast.

But not just any breakfast, Disney's Princess Character Breakfast with Jasmine, Ariel, Belle, Cinderella, Aurora, and Pocahantas. They had the usual breakfast type things and Princesses! The Estrogen was flowing like wine! Little girls running around the restaurant screaming like Mick Jagger had just walked into the room. I was in Little Girl Heaven waving my wand and trying to look stoically male (lest anyone think I was a weirdo).

Do you remember how I started this post? Everyone's a little bit male and a little bit female? Well, my decidedly female niece Natalie, was bored out of her mind. She wanted a beer, I think, and couldn't understand what all the squealing was about. My Mom and sister thought the whole thing was cute, but as I was picking up on Natalie's desire to grunt, scratch, and burp, I knew that she was not the type of woman to go all frilly on us. She was going to be one of the guys - the kind of girl who breaks her boyfriends heart by borrowing his favorite Jerry Rice jersey and never returning it. Ah well, live and learn.

The rest of our last day at WDW was spent mostly shopping and riding last minute rides. Since it was just us girls at first and we were in Epcot, of course we had to ride Test Track three more times before we left, and I ensured that we visited Space Ship Earth as we exited. Then we hopped on a bus to meet the MEN at the Magic Kingdom. We spent the afternoon revisiting our favorite attractions - Haunted Mansion, Pirates, Splash Mountain, Big Thunder, Space Mountain, etc... taking turns with the kids as need be. After about the fifth ride, Dave got tired of me poking him in the back of the head with my wand, so he grabbed it out of my hand and snapped it in two - and just like that, I turned back into a man and smacked Dave on the back of the head with my hand and then he chased me after the ride was over and beat me up. Brothers!

We voted where we wanted to spend our last WDW meal together and the vote was nearly unanimous. And so, despite my new favorite being in Downtown Disney, we went back to EPCOT and ate at Canada's Le Cellier one last time. And then, quietly, we returned to the hotel and started to pack.

Its been a long trip, and its nearly over. Tomorrow, I'll be writing my last post from home. It'll be late, so my comments might be short. See you then.

NO ONE WRITES LIKE OUR WILL, NO ONE FIGHTS LIKE OUR WILL! NO ONE TRAIPSES AROUND WITH A WAND LIKE OUR WILL! I'M ESPECIALLY GOOD AT EXAGGERATING! OH WHAT A GUY IS OUR WILL! Sorry, couldn't help myself... I just become a Beast sometimes... or is it a Beauty. One can never tell. I'll post the last little bit about our trip home sometime this weekend. Now, stay tuned for our regularly scheduled Friday Category - Brought To You By Exxon Mobile and the Letter's F and U.

Days of Future Perfect - Day Eight

The end of the future vacation approaches like a trip around Walt Disney's Magic Kingdom with stops at Frontierland and Mickey's Toontown Stations, passengers should stand by to BOOOOOOAAAAAAARRRRRRDDDDDDDD! Uh, sorry, a little lost in the clouds there. This post is/was/willbeagain dated September 15th, 2006. I hope you enjoy it as much as I likely will one day.

The Happiest Place on Earth

When you see the delight on a child's face as he runs around Disneyworld, excited beyond words, his cheeks glowing red with pleasure and love for you, for the world, and for everything he can possibly experience in a short amount of time, you are reminded of the motto, "The Happiest Place on Earth". Indeed, it is only as we grow older and worry about cash, and eating, and politics, and travel plans, that the words diminish in our minds. A trip to Disneyland when you are young is like Crack Cocaine for young minds - it alters them in ways that make the idea of pleasure and enjoyment and fun a serious addiction.

Can't we all just get along? Rodney King was mocked for those words - as if his simple plea was ridiculous. But its the sort of hope that perches in your soul when you are living the good life. You don't ever want it to end. But even as a kid, that kind of hope is unrealistic. We know that at the end of the day, or week, or vacation, the whole world must return to its conflict driven status and our time in complete happiness must end. Still, while we are here, we are allowed to dream and to be happy and to forget about our troubles or the real world. Any place that can do that is truly magical.

I no longer run the streets of the Magic Kingdom carefree and happy as I did when I was a child, but I can remember what it was like by watching today's children do it. Perhaps its seeing the hope and joy on the face of a child that makes Disney special for me now. We are shaping the lives of future generations. We need them to have a place of complete and utter happiness to remind them of the ultimate goal.

Today was my nephew Joshua's Disney/TAC Day. He is almost three years old and the joy that has radiated from him during the week has been mostly infectious. For a kid, any kid, to be allowed to run around at will at Disney parks for a week is pure magic. To get a Disney/TAC Day on top of it, well, that's just the cherry on top.

Today was a manly day. The men woke up and took Joshua out for a manly breakfast at Chef Mickey's Character Buffet. Then we went to the Magic Kingdom for the first stop on our manly voyage - Tom Sawyer Island. This island paradise is a place especially designed for kids. From rope bridge swings to secret kid sized passages through dark and scary mines, this is a place to play and to imagine and to have fun. Joshua was a little too young to catch all the nuances, but he liked bouncing on the bridge and he liked climbing the rocks. He didn't quite grasp the entire dark mine tunnel things, but he did easily grasp the air rifles in the fort - in fact, it was almost impossible to get him away from them once he got going.

After Tom Sawyer Island, we took him on a manly voyage on the train around the Magic Kingdom, stopping at Main Street USA and disembarking. We left the MK behind and headed to the bus stop where we took a manly bus to the Disney Studios, home of the Honey I Shrunk The Kids Play Area.

This giant play area has slides and ropes and things to climb and dirt to dig in and all sorts of things to do. Joshua ran around for the first five minutes just trying to figure out what to do first. The manly men with him were finding it tiresome to keep up. But we took turns and Joshua was fast wearing himself out.

We stopped for a manly snack at the bakery, reloading Joshua's batteries with a pure sugar rush, and then headed back to the main gate again - this time catching a bus for the Animal Kingdom. By the time we arrived at Animal Kingdom's Bone Yard - a giant play area with slides, ropes, things to climb and dirt to dig - Joshua was ready to go again. He ran around the Bone Yard and did anything his little heart desired, while we monitored him from afar. He quickly grew tired of this arrangement though and joined us on the bench.

The manly men rested, having accomplished our manly task for the day, and waited for the women folk to join us. They found us at the Bone Yard and we all went off to try Expedition Everest again and to take one final ride on the safari after lunch first at Tusker House. We were all more than ready to head home at that point and spend a long afternoon by the pool.

The quiet moments of a Disney vacation are often the best. Riding the roller coasters are fun, but the experience is canned. You ride up and down the same hills, scream at the same points, etc... The true experience of a Disney vacation is the one you create with your family, friends, and loved ones. All my favorite moments in Disney travels occured not as a result of a ride experience, but as a result of something that we did to make the moments as enjoyable as possible. Spending a few hours by the pool with my niece and nephew was probably the highlight of my trip so far.

Until tonight. And Celeste.

Celeste was waiting for me in the lobby when I arrived. She was absolutely gorgeous in a prefectly normal outfit that still managed to put my slacks, shirt, and dress shoes to shame. I had been doing a bit of research since the night before and found the perfect place for a quiet dinner. I'd called ahead and made reservations and told my family that I wasn't feeling well and to go out to dinner without me - they'd gone to the Sci Fi Dine In at the Disney Studios for dinner. She greeted me warmly.

"Ready to go?" she asked, when I arrived.

"I've made reservations," I said.

Her eyebrows went up, "You made reservations?"

"Is that okay?" I replied.

"Am I dressed appropriately?" she asked.

"You look heavenly."

I told her to leave the car and we walked down the dark path by moonlight to the boat dock, talking and holding hands along the way. When the boat arrived, we took a seat up front and she leaned her head on my shoulder as we rode across the quiet waters of Bay Lake. We passed the Contemporary and reached the dock at the Magic Kingdom. From there it was a short ride to the Grand Floridian where we disembarked and headed past all the restaurants, much to Celeste's confusion, and towards the beach.

"I thought we'd get a burger at the waterfront beach stand," I said.

She stopped in her tracks and looked at me with a hint of malice in her eyes, "You thought what?"

"No, really." I said, "I hear they make a great cheeseburger here. And the fries and milkshakes are to die for."

Something in my eyes gave me away, however, and she just smiled and played along, "Do they have Chocolate milkshakes?"

"Well... no, so I guess we'll have to go with Plan B," I replied.

"What's plan B?"

As we rounded the corner on the beach, she saw what Plan B was - a 20 foot Bay Yacht with its lights twinkling and the aroma of a perfectly cooked meal waiting us on board. Celeste caught her breath.

"Is that intimate enough for you?" I asked.

The cruise was short but memorable. We rode around the Bay, looking at the various resorts from the water while we served a four course meal by our own personal chef and listened to our own violinist while we drank wine and snuggled in the back of the boat. Mostly, though, we just talked and that flowed from us naturally and pleasantly. There was no expectations from either of us, we were just there in the moment, enjoying ourselves and enjoying the Happiest Place on Earth.

All to abruptly, however, the fireworks came and then we floated back to the dock. We took our time going back to the hotel and then, out by the geyser, we kissed. I gave her a hug and thanked her for a wonderful evening and told her that I'd call again and then it was over.

I floated to my hotel room to grab the laptop and I have to admit its taken me a while to write this tonight - as if putting it into words will pop this dream bubble that I am in. Still, I have to thank Andy for loaning me the money for the boat - I guess he's desperate to win a case of beer ;)

My family didn't buy the whole, I was feeling sick so I went out for a walk story. I think they're on to me. Still, its hard enough meeting a girl like Celeste alone. Its way too early to expose her to the family, even in passing.

Tomorrow is the last full day at WDW and Natalie gets to have the last TAC/Disney Day. I get to explore my feminine side and become a Princess for the Day. Apropo considering I'll be heading back to SF soon ;) See you tomorrow.

Elisa - In case you hadn't caught on, these posts are from the future. As much as Celeste exists in my mind in a quasi Audrey Hepburn type fantasy, I am afraid the rest of the post is just as questionably real. I can only hope that my reality matches the one posted here and in each of the previous seven days of this vacation. As for the rest of you, my future forays are quickly coming to an end and soon good old Bible thumping, soap box preaching Will shall return. I hope you prefer fact to fiction. See you tomorrow.

Days of Future Perfect - Day Seven

Closing in on the conclusion now of my future vacation - this dated Septemeber 14th, 2006. I think you can start to see the fatigue factor setting in here. I'll let you judge for yourself.

ULTERIOR MOTIVES

I woke up in a great mood and went for a job - beat my best personal time (modern era), and came back to the hotel ready to conquer the world, or at least part of it. Today was to be our down day and everyone pretty much wanted to sleep in and recover, but not me! I was half tempted to let them sleep so that I could head over to the golf course for another lesson, but I had things to accomplish today and pining over some girl wasn't going to get them done.

I decided to surprise them all. I went to the Roaring Forks Cafe and I ordered breakfast enough for everyone. Then I carried it back up to the rooms and knocked on the door. Carl opened the door to my sister's room and his eyes went wide with the first smell of coffee. I delivered breakfast to him and then went into my room and delivered breakfast to my Mom and brother.

Everyone woke up and decided to lounge around. My sister and I, however, took off for her TAC/Disney day. I interviewed her in the lobby, underneath that lobby music, and then we headed to the bus stop and boarded the bus for the Disney Studios. I had packed with me a drawing pad, a dark pen, and my camera.

We were some of the first people to arrive at the gate and as soon as the park opened, Heather and I dashed up the quiet streets towards the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. Before boarding, however, we grabbed a Fast Pass for TOT for a later time. Then we walked right into the first room of the ride, where Rod Serling does his introduction. I filmed as much of this as possible. Then we walked through the short line and boarded the first elevator available.

I handed Heather a piece of drawing paper with the letter "A" on it, and told her to hold it up when they took our pictures at the top of the ride. We rode the ride and screamed to our hearts content. When we got to the bottom, I took the letter back and we walked into the lobby to pick up our photo. The manager gave us a strange look as we purchased our TOT photo with the letter "A" prominently displayed. I took the manager aside and "explained" my plan - that I was going to propose to my long standing fiancee by writing it out one letter at a time. I told him I needed all 26 letters, and that I'd pay for each and every photo. He congratulated me and let me go ahead. Heather gave me the evil eye.

Ulterior Motive #1: I explained to Heather my real plan, which was to use the letters to create the opening sequence of the Disney Day films. She weighed her love of TOT versus what I wanted to do, and then she let me do it after I agreed to let her make as many funny faces as possible during the filming. For the next two and a half hours, we rode TOT fifteen times, getting all the letters we needed to complete the project. Then we thanked the manager and said that we'd be back after a short break. And we left.

Ulterior Motive #2: I changed my lunch plans and took Heather with me to Beaches and Cream for lunch. She'd always wanted to go, so she didn't suspect a thing. Unfortunately, I didn't happen to bump into Celeste while we were there. But I did have a great open faced Chili Burger with lots of french fries. My diet was quickly going downhill. Afterwards, Heather and I headed to EPCOT to meet up with the rest of the gang.

We rode Test Track three more times and did Spaceship Earth one last time. I rode it fondly, figuring that by the time I came back in four years, it would most likely be gone. One needs to embrace these final rides as much as possible, because you never know what's going to happen next.

We ate dinner at Alfredo Di Roma in the Italy pavillion and enjoyed Fettucini and enough other kinds of pasta to satisfy the hungriest man. It was a great meal and the wine was superb. When dinner was done, we walked over to the American Adventure pavillion and watched the show one last time before we headed for the exit. At the last second, I convinced everyone to come with me via monorail and enjoy the fireworks from the beach of the Polynesian. They were reluctant but they went.

The night was warm though, and the kids got to splash and dig in the dirt on the beach shore, until we saw the first kick of fireworks light up the night sky and the PA system at the resort broadcast the music from the park. To be honest, I think it might have been the best time I ever watched the fireworks. Even the kids liked it.

We rode the monorail back to the TTC and took a bus from there to our hotel. We were all exhausted and headed upstairs for a quick game of Madlibs and then bed. I took my laptop downstairs to the lobby again... and I grabbed my cell phone as well.

What is the amount of time you are supposed to wait before you call? I'm constantly reminded of the movie Swingers whenever I think of this question. It wasn't too late, only 9pm, when I dialed the number on the back of the card Celeste had given me. Her answering machine clicked on and I hesitated before leaving a message.

"Uh, hello, Celeste," I said, nervously, "This is Will. I was just calling to thank you again for the other day and..."

She picked up the phone and said, "Sorry. I didn't get to my machine in time. Its good to hear from you."

"Uh, yeah," I replied. "Uh, me too."

I suddenly realized that I'm terrible on the phone. I write because I can't speak. And without my cute little facial gestures or my nicely controlled written prose, I am nothing - an annoying electronic voice on the other end of the phone line. I had no idea what to say, so I decided to come straight to the point.

"Do you think we could see each other again? Before I go," I asked.

"I'd love to. What did you have in mind?"

"Dinner, tomorrow night?"

"Okay... but no burgers this time."

"I didn't come prepared to dress really fancy," I noted. "Artist Point?"

"I was thinking something a little more... intimate. I'll pick you up at 8:00?"

My heart was pounding against my chest and I somehow managed to remain cool and say, "8:00 it is. See you tomorrow."

"Bye, Will."

"Bye."

And then I sat down in front of the Wilderness Lodge fireplace and started writing this blog. So now you all know. Tomorrow, dinner. The next day... who knows. But the day after that... home. As inevitable as a Shakesperian Romance, this little vacation fling must eventually come to an end.

I know what an exterior and interior is, but really, what is an ulterior? Any English majors out there? Anyway, I digress. Hard to imagine that I could be so bold... or will be so bold... or potentially could possibly be so bold. Douglas Adams was right. Speaking in the future tense when dealing with alternate universes is a real pain in the butt. See you all tomorrow.

Days of Future Perfect - Day Six

If you don't know what's going on by now, I suggest you read like the last five posts. For the rest of you, enjoy Day Six.

The Celeste Prophesy

Its funny how some stories that we make up just seem to come so close to reality. My sister and Andy have been trying to insinuate some sort of fantasy girl into my life for the past several days, commenting on my blog about this new uber fantastic redhead. Things couldn't be further from the truth.

I started my TAC/Disney Day early. I woke up and went for a run along the path between Fort Wilderness and the Wilderness Lodge. When I got back, I showered, shaved, and dressed in a casual outfit and headed down to the lobby for my interview with Carl. Carl took the camera and did a rather mundane interview with me in the lobby - asking me again and again where I was going. I told him that it was a secret. He finally gave up and went off to join the others for a day at the Disney Studios.

After they left, I hopped on to a bus to the TTC and then caught a monorail to the Polynesian Resort. I went to the Kona Cafe for breakfast and coffee and leisurely sat back and enjoyed my meal without any kids, adults, or otherwise to bother me. At about 9:00am, I hopped on the monorail again and went to the Grand Floridian, where I caught a cab to my destination.

I had a 9:30am lesson with a private instructor at the Osprey Pines Golf Course near the former Dixie Landings resort. I arrived with about ten minutes to spare, went to the pro shop to get properly outfitted and to rent some equipment, then headed off to find the Pro for my training session. I'd been looking forward to a day of relaxation as I walked around the course, talked golf and sports with my trainer, and just generally chilled out. Then I met my instructor and SHE changed all that.

The moment I saw Celeste, my heart nearly stopped and I felt myself becoming tongue tied and self conscious at the same time. A tall raven haired beauty who looked as if she'd just stepped out of a Grecian statue, she had a bright smile and a gentle tan and a wonderful laugh. I became extremely nervous.

I carried my clubs to the back of the golf cart and we drove to the first tee. She started asking me questions about my golf game and was surprised to hear that I had never played before.

"Usually, we have people who have at least taken a lesson before," she noted.

I explained that I had tried to take lessons before but could never find an empty class in California. Or Idaho, for that matter. She smiled and said that she'd have to change her lesson plan a little, but that she'd still try to teach me. My heart soared - and I realized it had little to do with learning how to play golf.

She couldn't have been more gracious or patient. 16 swings later, I had driven the ball off the tee an entire 70 yards - nearly hitting a tree... and another golfer. She told me to forget about it and we drove to where the ball was. She then explained golf club selection and how each club represented so many yards potential. She handed me a 3 Wood, I think. I forget the yards. I lined up the shot, bent my knees, concentrated on the ball and swung. Fwack! Doing! Ow! I hit the ball hard. It sliced and hit the golf cart and rebounded right at Celeste, who got out of the way just in time for the ball to hit me square in the chest.

"Are you alright?" she asked, bending down over my fallen body. I felt like I could float, but I just nodded and stood back up with a sheepish grin.

"Sorry." I said.

"Maybe golf just isn't your sport," she suggested.

"You don't think there's a little tiger in me?" I asked.

"Well... maybe a little," she said. "Let's try that again."

I'd like to say that eventually I got it. But after two holes it was obvious that I was hopeless. We approached one lie and I walked over to the ball and said, "Would you mind if we just walked for a while? I need some time to absorb all this information and we could let some of the other groups play through."

"Okay," she said.

We walked and talked and learned things about each other and before long, I'd completely forgotten the lesson and the reason I was supposedly there. I didn't shoot a single frame of video on the golf course. I suppose what came next was inevitable, though I certainly didn't see it coming.

As we walked into the clubhouse I said, "I feel like I've wasted your time this morning. Let me make it up to you and take you to lunch?"

Now where the heck had that come from? I almost wanted to look around to see who had said those words knowing that they couldn't have come from me. I expected Celeste to look away embarassed and let me down easy.

"I'd love to," she said.

"Great..." I replied and I suddenly thought, now what?

Just as I was trying to think of a place to take her and impress her, Celeste said, "Do you like burgers?"

Was this a test? I decided not to lie, "Yeah."

"I know this great place. I'll drive." Which was good, since I didn't have a car.

She drove me to the Beach Club resort and we parked and went to Beaches and Cream restaurant and ordered delicious cheeseburgers, cokes, and ice cream sundaes. It was by far the most decadent meal I'd had since I'd gotten there. I just looked at her the entire time and wondered where she put it all.

"I wouldn't have pictured you as the cheeseburger type," I said.

"I eat the worst things," she replied. "If I didn't walk all day... and jump out of the way of bad slices... I might not be in such good shape."

"Stick with me, kid, and I'll make sure you never gain another pound," I said.

We laughed and had a good time, but eventually she had to go back to work and I had to go back to my vacation. I thanked her again for everything and then, it suddenly got quiet between us, as we sensed that this was the end of our time together.

"I'd like to send you a copy of my novel when its done," I said. It was the worst line I could ever imagine saying, but it popped out of my mouth all the same. You'd think a writer could come up with smooth dialogue on the spot... but that's why we're writers and not actors. Ad libs are not our thing.

"Oh... okay," she said.

"But, uh, I need your number or... uh... business card or something," I replied. When you're really embarrassed you can feel your face turning red. I didn't need a mirror to know I was blushing like a crab.

"Sure," she replied, and handed me her business card. "My home phone number is on the back. Call me before you head home. We'll do dinner."

I started looking around for one of those defibrilators because my heart had surely stopped. I shook her hand and she leaned in and kissed my cheek and I knew I was in full cardiac arrest. Somehow, I let go and she walked away and I just stood there like Midas had touched me, unable to move.

Compared with that, what was the rest of my day like? I barely remember. I joined the others in Animal Kingdom and rode Expedition Everest and Dinosaur and cooled down a little on the Kali River Rapids, but I remained tight lipped about my morning telling them only that they would find out on Saturday.

We stayed in at the hotel tonight and ate at the Whispering Canyon Cafe. The kids really loved it and watching them hop around the lobby on wooden horse sticks started to bring me back down to earth. We went for a swim after dinner and just enjoyed our evening together as a family. I reminded Heather about her Disney/TAC Day in the morning and then I went off to a quiet spot to close out my thoughts on camera about what my Disney Day had been like.

And now I'm finished with the blog. Its strange that my friends and family have been trying to hook me up with a fictional redhead when the reality is so much better. Tomorrow, I will have to get my feet back underneath me and continue this vacation without the thought of Celeste constantly on my mind. Wish me luck.

Celeste - definitely not my type. I'm holding out for a redhead. I've waited this long, I'm not about to throw myself at the first beautiful smart athletic golf instructor who comes my way, no matter what my future blog tells me. I've got to remain strong if I'm going to win this bet with Andy ;) See you tomorrow.

Days of Future Perfect - Day Five

Welcome back to the ongoing RSS Feed from the future - September 12th, 2006 to be exact. As you can see in today's post, my trip takes a turn towards the normal as we finally enter the Magic Kingdom and confront Herr Mickey.

Rolling, rolling, rolling...

Wisely, I think, I decided not to jog today and I think Disney Security forgave me for my faux pas of yesterday. I slept in this morning, exchanging wilderness views for comfy sheets and blankets. Dave has come down with a hacking cough - a mixture of humid days and A/C nights. I've got him on a treatment of cough drops and I've started drinking more OJ and taking Halls as a preventative measure.

We decided to slow down our pace a little - having run ourselves a little ragged the first four days, even though we haven't seen a great many attractions. Today is Carl's Disney/TAC day and the rest of the famdamily is heading over to the Magic Kingdom for a visit with Mickey Mouse. But first, we all boarded the boat for Fort Wilderness Campground and breakfast at the Trail End Buffet.

This delightfully woody campground restaurant is filled with all the wonderful things you remember eating for breakfast, or at least, that you think of as breakfast food (there were no googly bacon sandwiches, or TIC TOC Burgers, or Wheatabix cereal, so it wasn't entirely a trip down memory lane. Thank God!) There were pancakes, bacon, sausage, fruit, cereal, oatmeal, waffles, eggs, omelets, corned beef hash, etc... We all ate our fill and had a delightful meal.

Next up, as everyone else climbed into the boat for the trip to the MK, Carl and I headed through the campground at Fort Wilderness towards the bus stop. Being after the summer vacation, the campground were pretty empty. I stopped and interviewed him in front of the horse corral and then we went and boarded the bus for EPCOT Center.

At EPCOT, we went immediately to Innoventions and looked around the place. This is Carl's thing. He likes new toys and new technology and he was looking around for the latest thing. But after ten minutes he turned to me and said, "This is all old stuff - like last year." I told Carl that this technology was more for the average consumer and that we liked to see things like larger flat screen TV's like the 9 foot outdoor screen Andy bought for his ranch up near Davis - it does double duty as a jumbo tron screen for the little league field he built in the former corn pasture. But I digress...

After a few minutes in Innoventions, I looked at my watch and realized that we had only a short amount of time to get where we needed to be, so I grabbed Carl and we took off to Guest Relations at the front of the park. Here, I checked us both in to the Around The World Tour of EPCOT.

They first took us into a class room with about 20 other guests. We each selected a safety helmet and watched a short film about the Segway vehicle and how to ride one. Then our instructors taught us how to ride. Carl took to it right away - this being his third or fourth time on one. I, on the other hand, promptly ran over my instructor's toe. But, I stayed on - at least until I ran into the wall. Anyway, I was content to just walk the rest of the way, but they made me ride as punishment. After about an hour of learning the basics of how to operate this thing, then we formed up single file and headed out of the classroom and into the World Showcase - which had not yet opened to the public.

They took us around the world, stopping in each country of the World Showcase to talk a tiny bit about each pavillion. Mostly, though, they gave us an excuse to just ride the things to our hearts content. As a tour goes, it was a great drivers training course. I won't say that I didn't have fun, though. After my initial jitters, I was soon riding with the best of them. Don't tell Heather, but Carl was flirting with the CM's - I think he was trying to schmooze them out of an extra pin. Half way through we were able to stop and take pictures and video and I whipped out the camera and got plenty of footage of Carl driving around and nearly running down the CM's. He really does look like he belongs on the special bus in that helmet. Anyway...

When the tour was done and we were given our pins, they allowed us to go back in to the World Showcase a few minutes ahead of the rest of the crowds. We headed straight towards Maelstrom - the backwards boat ride in Norway. And then, as soon as the ride was over, we walked over to Germany and I bought Carl and Brat and a Beer. Our snack now done, we returned to the front of the park and hopped on the monorail for the trip back to the MK.

We joined up with the rest of the family for lunch at Tony's Town Square. Nobody was very hungry after our big breakfast, but we all managed to eat. Carl and I got caught up on what they'd been doing while we were gone - mostly Fantasyland stuff - and now we were ready to move on.

We first went to Adventureland and climbed up the Swiss Family Treehouse. Then we rode Jungle Cruise - which Natalie enjoyed (finally starting to get the concept of rides). After that, we rode the Aladdin Magic Carpets and Natalie loved swirling around and around in the sky and Joshy got to control Uncle Will's carpet. But we pushed our luck when we went to visit the Tiki Birds and Heather and Natalie had to duck out halfway through the show. But Joshy, on the other hand, started talking back to the birds - telling them off for scaring his sister. It was funnier than the show.

Mom and Heather and Natalie decided to do a little shopping, so Da Boys went on Pirates of the Carribean together (ARRRGGH!). We all loved it - though as much as I enjoyed the new technologies on the ride, part of me still longed for the old fashioned Pirates before they started monkeying with the ride. Joshy did really well through the dark passages, but that may have been because Uncle Dave kept tickling him. Afterwards, we went to the Pieces of Eight Pirates Store and reoutfitted Joshy with official Pirate Gear. We returned him to his mother with a hooked arm, wooden leg, eye patch and henna tatoos. Arrrggghhh!

We rode Big Thunder and Splash Mountain, taking turns with the kids, and stopped and had ice cream (which was really the first "snack" we'd had on the trip so far). But then it was time to send the kids back to the room for a nap. I volunteered to take them with Mom so that the rest could stay and enjoy the parks a little longer. We took the kids back to the docks and rode the boat back to Wilderness Lodge.

That night we took the boat over to the Contemporary Resort and ate dinner at the Concourse Steakhouse - with the Monorails sailing overhead every few minutes. After dinner, we waddled upstairs to the Monorail and rode it into the Magic Kingdom so that we could watch the parade and the fireworks show. The kids loved it and it made for the perfect end to a long day.

When I got back to the hotel, I made sure the arrangements had been made for my own Disney/TAC Day and asked Carl to accompany me the next morning so that someone could interview me and film my exploits for the website. But that's tomorrow's blog. Tonight, I'm actually going to bed early. See you then.

Well, that was hump day. Tomorrow the blogs begin to take us to end of the trip. And things begin to take some interesting turns... but that's still in your future. So I'll let you wait to read them later.

A Novel Update

This is just a quick post to answer some questions about the Novel. Hopefully, the next update will say, "ITS FINISHED!"

The first draft was finished back in May of last year. As this was obviously the first time I'd ever written a Novel, I didn't really have any idea what to expect. I thought I'd take a month off and then go back and respell a few words and that I'd be done around August of last year (or sooner). But when I sat down to read the book, I began to notice a few subtle problems with the first two acts. And then I read the third act and nearly freaked out at the large problems that were there. I wasn't the only one who'd read the book and had these thoughts. My Dad has been pretty much my chief sounding board during this entire process, having read the synopsis and the first draft in their entirety.

So, first I had to figure out what was really wrong. Then I had to figure out how to fix it. Then I still had to go through and adjust all that creative spelling and rephrase certain bits to make them sound like they were written in english. And after all that, then I had to actually sit down and rewrite all that. The book was 1155 pages long and that, as it turns out, is a lot of pages to edit.

The good news is that I am approaching the end of the rewriting phase. I have about 20 chapters to go. The great news is that, so far at least, it seems I have corrected all the major problems with the story. Everything that remains now can be adjusted with minor tweaks.

So, I'm looking to put this puppy to bed once and for all in the next three weeks or so. And quite frankly, I'm ready to bury this thing in a lead vault 20 feet below ground and never look at it again. Every word on every page has become torture for me - like the final six hours of World War I, knowing that an armistice is just around the corner. Somewhere that last analogy works...

Anyway, thanks for the prayers and the well wishes. I will be looking for people to read the completed magnum opus in the near future - but not until all the I's are crossed and the T's dotted ;)

Friday Pyramid Scheme Categories

Now that an amateur archaeologist has discovered pyramids in Bosnia, I think we need to revisit some other past historical misconceptions:

Assuming that these blogs existed and have just yet to be uncovered by amateur internet scholars, Name three blog titles from famous people of the past? (I.E. The Da Vinci Blog - Leondardo Da Vinci, etc...)

Days of Future Perfect - Day Four

A quick reminder; Due to a "glitch" in the RSS feed, I have received blog posts from the ICON of the future - September, to be precise. This particular post is dated Sept. 11th, 2006. I hope you enjoy the fourth day of my WDW trip as much as I did.

HELP!

I used to love those wacky 60's movies where the music and the actors were way more important than the plot - our own version of Bollywood. Today, my trip to WDW took a decidedly Bollywood turn as we commemorated the 5th Anniversary of the attacks in New York and Washington D.C. and as Dave and I took off on our second TAC Day.

I started the morning with another short jog. I tried to find a shortcut through the woods, and maybe another jogging route. The one to Fort Wilderness campgrounds is nice, but I hate jogging on footpaths. Considering the morning and the lack of people's senses of humor on a "Day Like Today", it was probably not the smartest thing in the world to do. I got lost in the woods. I was looking for some sort of familiar landmark to guide myself back to the path when I heard a rustling in the bushes. I stood still and waited for what I was sure was going to be some critter intent on eating me to spring out of the bushes. Instead, it was Disney security, and they weren't too pleased with my short cut story.

The inside of the Disney Security Building is cool. I'd go into more detail, but honestly, I think these guys are doing a great job and I don't want to make their jobs any harder. In the light of a new scene, and after a little calling around, Disney Security eventually accepted my story and took me back to my hotel. I thanked them profusely and apologized for giving them such a scare. I have a feeling, though, that there's probably an unmanned flying Mickey plane following my every move now.

Everyone wondered what had happened to me and I made up some sort of story that didn't embarass me too much. Then I took a shower, changed clothes, and told Dave to meet me in the lobby. Everyone else was headed off to EPCOT for the morning, and Dave and I were going to meet them after our little TAC/Disney Day excursion.

Once again, I explained to Dave the concepts of the TAC/Disney Day and then I took him down in front of the geyser at Wilderness Lodge to interview him. Once we were done with that, we boarded a boat to the Contemporary Lodge (That's the one with the Monorail riding through its center). As soon as we got off the boat, Dave looked worried - and he had every right to be worried.

We walked over to the other side of the lagoon - the side that faces the Magic Kingdom and down to the boat docks there. We then checked in at the Flying Aces Paragliding Charters office. Dave gave me a, "Oh, Hell No!" look, but I convinced him to give it a try. Okay, so it probably wasn't such a good idea.

Dave hates to fly, and combining that with a bad back and swimming, just made Dave's morning. But the view from the top of the paragliding arc was pretty damn cool. It was just the getting there that Dave didn't really like. We raced across the lagoon with Dave acting as our own version of the Goodyear Blimp and then we pulled him back in to the boat. And then Dave, then and there, got an evil look in his eye and plopped down his credit card and made me go.

I'll admit to being freaked out. But, again, it was a great view. I can't wait to see the footage Dave shot of me.

After that, I treated Dave to something a little more his speed as we headed off to Downtown Disney and went to the Virtual Arcade. I let Dave make a virtual roller coaster for me and I rode it. I think the thing was like 99% upside down. We played the Virtual Pirates of the Carribean and then we grabbed a quick bite to eat and a slice of cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory outlet restaurant that was there before we quickly headed to EPCOT to meet up with the rest of the group.

Being a smaller group of just Heather, Mom, Carl and the two kids, the strollers were loaded down with Disney merchandise by the time Dave and I arrived and Carl was grumbling because they'd only been on one ride. We joined them for lunch at the Moroccan Restaurant, though Dave and I only had appetizers. After that, we all went over to the American Adventure pavillion again to honor America on 9/11. There was an extra sense of patriotism today, just like there had been four years before on the first anniversary.

After that, we wandered through the countries and then headed back to Future World to ride the rides we'd missed the first time and some that we simply had to ride again and again (Test Track, anyone). The Soarin that is here is the same as the one in California and while neat, is still not a great ride - especially with the line as long as it is.

This was our first full day in the park where we didn't stop for a nap. The kids were getting tired and cranky by the time Dinner rolled around. We checked in at Canada eagerly awaiting a meal that had been our favorite of 2002 and were not disappointed. Even though they didn't have a chef's special of Beef Stroganoff, I was definitely satisfied with my meal.

Everyone wanted to head home, but for once I decided to stay by myself and watcht the Illuminations show. It was loud, but it was fantastic. Afterwards, I did a little shopping as I meandered back to the front gate. I caught the last shuttle bus from the park and arrived back at the hotel pretty late - having had one of the most complete days I'd ever had at WDW.

I'm pretty exhausted now, though, and I'll probably sleep in tomorrow - which is Carl's Disney Day. At least I won't have to do a lot of walking tomorrow... hint, hint, hint...

Before I go, I just wanted to comment on the excellent blog post Ariel posted today on the early years of C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkein. Fascinating stuff. I can see why Miramax is sniffing around for good movie material. And I'm also glad to hear that R. Sherman has been hired to defend Karl Rove before the new Congressional grand jury. I think he'll be fair and even-handed. Of course, he'll miss the inevitable Giants-Cardinals NL Championship Series, but then we all must make sacrifices for our country.

See you tomorrow.

Wow. Some interesting news there at the end. I wonder what's going to happen in the next four months to make that information come true. I guess we'll just have to wait and see. Have a good weekend.

Days of Future Perfect - Day Three

Continuing with my visit to the future thanks to an odd RSS glitch that sent 10 blog posts from the future back in time, today it looks like we take a few odd left turns along the way to an exciting day at Walt Disney World. This post is dated, Septemer 10th, 2006. The most interesting stuff, however, is up front in a discussion about the inner workings of a writer's mind. I hope you enjoy.

WHOAH!

Whoah seemed to be the watch word today. It was the sound made by Joshy when he got to see the lions and elephants up close. It was the sound my Mom made when she realized what TAC had in store for her Disney Day. And it was the sound that escaped my lips when I received an e-mail from Andy this morning telling me that his spy show thingy had been green lit. I haven't even finished the pilot script yet and Andy's already got the show green lit. Whoah!

So, you may ask, what's the problem? Why don't I just pop out a script really fast and get it over with? Well, allow me to explain...

The show is called Brock Lee - International Accountant. Its a spy show. It follows the main character, an average accountant at a large construction firm, who somehow manages to get involved in the high stakes world of espionage. In the pilot episode, Brock gets sent to a Texas Construction Company, called EnWill, for a conference on construction in the Gulf Coast post Katrina (see, its modern and edgy!) and gets caught up in a nefarious plan to separate Texas from the United States. By the show's end, Brock discovers that his wife and two kids secretly work for the CIA and that there may be more to the death of his mother in a tragic blimp accident than he at first suspected. Just the sort of mindless drivel that is green lit before the script is even completed, right? My problem is that I can't write this with a straight face. It's supposed to be serious, but every draft I do sounds like a bad episode of The Flintstones. I can even hear Barney Rubble speaking Brock's dialogue and its starting to mess with my mind. Whoah! I think I'm going crazy.

But since I am on vacation, I can ignore these little insanity trips and concentrate on having a good time.

This morning we headed off to Animal Kingdom first so that the kids could get a chance to see the real animals up close and personal. Our morning was actually uneventful, stopping for breakfast snacks in the Roaring Forks Snack shop downstairs in our hotel before we boarded the bus for the long ride to Animal Kingdom. We arrived in Animal Kingdom and were immediately impressed by the giant Mt. Everest that now climbed out of the back of the Animal Kingdom park. You can't see the Tree of Life from the ticket windows, but you can sure see the roller coaster. As soon as the gates opened we headed with the crowds at a mad rush through the Oasis and towards the center island.

In all my previous trips, almost everyone in the crowd would have continued heading to the back of the park to board the trams for the first ride on the safari. But this time, as we reached the center island, more than half the crowd peeled off and headed towards Asia to be amongst the first of the day to ride the new roller coaster - Everest Expedition. We contemplated going there first to get Fast Passes but then decided that the park wasn't likely to be crowded today and continued to the safari.

This was only the second ride Natalie had been on and she loved it - for the most part. She hated the bumpy start of the tram (it has to cross all those gates that keep the animals inside) but was thrilled when we were finally able to point out some of the animals. Joshy pulled out the camera Grandma had given him and she showed him how to take pictures. Under the best of circumstances this ride is hard on the camera enthusiast because it jostles so much, but Joshua didn't know any better and so had a blast taking pictures. How many will end up being pictures of fingers or sky or someone's leg? Who knows... but probably slightly less than the number of pictures I take that end up as pictures of fingers, sky, legs, etc... ;)

After the Safari we walked through the Gorilla exhibit and watched the Gorillas for a while and the hippos swimming in their lake. Then, since we were there, we took the train out to Conservation Station and let the kids pet and feed the goats, sheep, and pony's at the petting zoo. This place hasn't really changed since my sister and I were there two weeks after it opened - and that's too bad.

After Conservation Station, we only had a little more time for us before Mom and I had to head off for our little Disney Day rendezvous. So we all headed down to Camp Minnie Mickey to watch The Festival of the Lion King show - which is just fantastic. Everyone loved this show, but the kids couldn't help watching the acrobats and saying, "Whoah!"

After the show, Mom and I headed towards the exit while Heather, Carl, Dave and the kids headed across the park to try and ride Expedition Everest. We reached the front of the park and I explained to Mom the concept behind the TAC Disney Day - to catalog the length and the breadth of the WDW experience with my family acting as guinea pigs. She looked worried.

I told her that the experience started right now and I whipped out my video camera and started interviewing her. You'll be able to see all this on my website about a month after we get back from our trip. Anyway, we boarded a bus bound for the Grand Floridian Resort for Sunday Brunch at Narcoosee's. Mom wanted to know what else was on the agenda, but I wouldn't tell her.

The Brunch was exquisite and we were both glad that we'd barely eaten anything that morning. After lunch, I called ahead to make sure that our reservation was still valid (thus building the anticipation) and then told Mom that we had to hurry or we'd be late for her appointment. Mom primped up her hair in anticipation.

At the last second, we turned away from the Grand Floridian Spa and the promise of a nice massage and deep wonderful body treatment, and we headed out the front door to board the cab that I had already requested. The driver had already been told where to go, so I just sat back and watched my Mom's expression as we drove to our new secret destination.

About four blocks from the destination, Mom saw a sign and heard the unmistakable roar of the race car engine and she opened her mouth and said, "Whoah!" In less than 30 minutes, she was strapped inside the passenger seat of an authentic Daytona 500 race car zipping around the Walt Disney World Richard Petty Experience track at speeds well in excess of 150 miles per hour. Her whole Disney Day experience lasted little more than three hours, but I dare say she loved every minute of it.

I swore her to secrecy, telling her that we would reveal everyone's experience only on Saturday - the day before we left. And then we headed back to the hotel and waited for the others to return from the Disney Studios where Heather was going to take the kids to Playhouse Disney.

Mom was more excited than the kids when everyone got back and I could see that she was frustrated in not being able to tell them why she was so excited, but the anticipation level rose in everyone else for their own Disney Day. I also told them that I had a great time as well.

After another mid-afternoon nap, we all took a leisurely time getting ready and heading off to dinner. We had reservations at the Cape May Buffet - a seafood buffet at the Yacht and Beach Club Resort near EPCOT. Two nights in a row, now, we'd eaten rich, succulent, and wonderful food and lots of it. I feared for my jog in the morning.

We were all too hyper to go to bed when we got back to the resort so we walked down along the beach and then returned to the video game parlor for the first round of our quad-annual Air Hockey tournament (Team Dave and Will, once again, crushed all comers!) Then we made our way to our rooms for more mad libs and sleep. I decided to get a drink at the lounge and am sitting here even now eyeing the cocktail waitress as I write this entry on my blog. I can only hope this night ends with me saying, "Whoah!"

In the meantime, I really must consider getting back to work on my first ever green lit pilot script. After all, its not every day a writer is guaranteed work. I suppose I can put a ribbon on a pig with the best of them. I don't know why Andy didn't pitch my idea for the pilot, but then again, it's his money.

See you all tomorrow, the Fifth Anniversary of 9/11. Until then, have a great day.

Well, there you have it. Day Three in the books and I'm already getting exhausted just thinking about this upcoming trip and all the writing work I'll be doing between now and then. Still, this glimpse into the future is pretty cool. See you all tomorrow.

Days of Future Perfect - Day Two

As I mentioned yesterday, a strange occurence with my RSS feed has gained me access to ten blogs from the future. This second part is dated September 9th, 2006. As you will read, during this period I will be vacationing in Disneyworld. Enjoy.

The Future Is Now

As I ran down the wooded path this morning at the crack of dawn for my early morning jog between the Wilderness Lodge and the Fort Wilderness Campground, my mind kept wandering to the e-mail I received last night from my agent, Alice. The pounding punishment I put my body through is extra satisfying this morning because I know that for me, the wait is nearly over. I am about to enter my future - and I'm running there.

After a quick shower, I managed to drag my slugabed brother out of his blanket cocoon and downstairs to the bus area. My nephew and niece looked up at me with the bored nuetral setting kids have when they're in their strollers - like a windup toy that is recharging, lifeless but pulsing with energy under the plastic mask of boredom. We boarded the bus and rode to the TTC at the center of Disneyworld and within seconds were onboard the monorail train bound for EPCOT center.

It seemed somehow fitting that while we were heading towards this experimental prototype community of tomorrow - this perfectly planned future - that I should break the news to my family.

"I got an e-mail last night from my agent," I said.

They were too busy showing my niece and nephew the surrounding countryside. I decided to keep the information to myself a little while longer.

We always begin our day at Epcot with a ride on Spaceship Earth. This was to be a barometer of our day as far as rides were concerned with the little ones. Deciding not even to risk it with my niece, who's only 16 months, my Mom decided to stay and watch the kids while the rest of us rode. Joshua, my nephew, rode with his Uncle Will and he was a big boy, only getting scared once - when Rome was burning.

Over the fire and tumult and looking into his scared face, I decided to distract him.

"I got an e-mail last night from my agent," I told him.

He looked me in the eye and then pointed and said, "Mickey!" As sure enough, Mickey Mouse appeared on a television screen.

Our ride came to an end and we decided that we would repeat the pattern throughout the rest of the day, taking turns minding Natalie while taking Joshua on as many rides as possible. By now, though, our stomachs were rumbling so we headed over to the food court in The Land for a quick and simple breakfast. I had a bagel and cream cheese. As everyone sat to eat, I opened my mouth to tell them what my agent had said, and Mickey Mouse arrived at the food court. My words died in my mouth under the onslaught of screaming toddlers (and my sister... go figure;)

All throughout the morning, as we rode Test Track (three times), the ride in the Imagination Pavillion, The Land boats, Nemo in the Living Seas, and all the neat little gadgets in Innoventions, I was unable to mention my good news. At first, I became discouraged. And then I just accepted the fact that perhaps the future would have to wait a little while longer.

We had lunch at the San Angel Restaurant in the Mexico pavillion and the food was much better this time around, though still not as good as the first time Heather and I ate here in 1998. However, we were all satisfied with the meal. We decided to take Natalie on her first ride of the trip on the tiny El River Del Tiempo. Its a ride that is literally about a minute long and that's at a slow glacial pace. Natalie didn't know what to make of it, but at least she didn't cry.

We worked our way around the world, stopping in China, and Germany (especially to look at the trains - Joshy loved the trains, but it was his daddy that we found the hardest one to pull away). I tasted my first beer in 6 months while we watched the trains go around and around the outdoor city. Eventually we reached the American Pavillion.

Carl made a nice trade off with us - finding the Funnel Cake cart first. He stayed with Natalie and enjoyed his funnel cake while we went in to enjoy what is arguably the best show at WDW. The World Trade Center flag that hangs inside the pavillion entrance is worth the price of admission alone. But the show that follows is a wonderful masterpiece. Joshua remained quiet throughout the entire show - sitting on his mommies lap so that he could see.

We were all starting to wind down and decided that we had enough time to go back to the room and collapse for a quick nap and maybe a swim before dinner. We managed to catch the Friendship Taxi across the lagoon and then walked out of the park and took the bus directly to our hotel. The air conditioned lobby reminded us how muggy it had been outside. And sure enough, just as we entered our rooms, it started to rain.

As we lay down for a quick nap, I said to no one in particular, "I got an email from my agent yesterday."

"Uh-huh."

"She said that..."

But then I heard snoring.

Dinner was at the wonderful Raglan Road restaurant in Downtown Disney. An Irish restaurant that serves sort of modern versions of Irish fare, we ate ourselves silly. Even the kids had a great time. We waddled back to the hotel and climbed upstairs for a game of madlibs - the clean version with the kids, and the naughty version when then went to bed. And finally, the day came to an end.

I discovered that my laptop was portable (duh!) and took it downstairs into the lobby where it was just me, the lobby music, and the gurgling from the water fountain. And that's where I'm sitting now, writing this, and basking in the glow of another Disney day gone by. Tomorrow, we'll be off to Animal Kingdom and the Disney Studios, and I'll be taking my Mom on our first TAC Disney Day.

But for now... my agent wrote in the e-mail that after only two weeks, she'd already received requests from 7 major publishers for the full length manucript. She said this was unusual for a first time author and that it boded well for the novel's success. To me, it means that someone besides myself and Sue liked the book. And that is plenty of success in my eyes. The future is not here yet, but I can just see it on the horizon.

See you all tomorrow.

Of course, when I read this blog from the future, I wasn't excited that I had an agent or that my novel was being seen by publishers, I was just happy to know that in the near future, the darn thing is finished! Anyway, stay tuned tomorrow when this blog goes NASCAR ;)

Days of Future Perfect - Day One

I was trying to get the RSS Feed (whatever that is) working on my blog and I must have done something wrong. Instead of RSS'ing, when I hit the enter key, this blog post from the future spit out. It was dated September 8th, 2006. I thought for sure that it was a mistake or something, until I read the last line. Anyway, I just thought you might like to read ahead a little. Oh, and now that you know what's going to happen - forewarned is forearmed.

My So-Called Vacation - Part One

It's nice to finally be settled in my room here at the Wilderness Lodge Resort at Walt Disney World, if for no other reason than to be away from all that constant political yammering going on in the news lately. But it has certainly been a trip from Hell so far.

With the lingering effects still being felt from Hurricane Jack, we thought it a good idea to check in at the airport a little early. My brother and I had shared a bedroom at my house last night so that we could get to the airport early. My sister's family and my Mom stayed at a hotel near the airport. We were all going to meet at the airport. I lugged my luggage down the stairs to the living room at about 4:30am and then had to lock the dogs in the basement so that my brother could come down - but of course he wanted to take a shower and dawdle all the while the dogs were barking and waking up the whole neighborhood. Needless to say, I was already on edge by the time the shuttle bus arrived.

We loaded the bus and started off and two blocks later I remembered the box of Noah's bagels I'd left on the kitchen table. That was our breakfast, so I had to convince the driver to take us back. He wasn't too pleased with me as I ran inside to get the bagels. Finally, about 5:15am we arrived at the airport. My sister and family was nowhere to be seen.

My brother and I checked on to the flight and then waited for my sister to arrive. I'll give her some credit. She's got three little kids to get up every morning and that's got to take some time - but one of them is her husband, and that's her own fault for not training him when she had the chance ;) They arrived half an hour after us and we all had to rush to get through security. Ironically, chronic terrorist suspect Carl (my sister's husband) was not pulled aside by security, but I was. Practically strip searched for no apparent reason (I sincerely doubt my agent has been sharing the contents of my book with Homeland Security, but with all the revelations these days about what they've been snooping into, one never knows ;) I was eventually reunited with the rest of my family at the boarding gate.

As I passed out the bagels to everyone, my brother decided then to inform me that he didn't eat bagels and that he was promised breakfast. My brother doesn't even begin to wake up until noon, so I knew that logic and reason weren't going to work. I decided to placate him and we ran off to a restaurant to get him a crappy wannabe Egg McMuffin. They were calling the flight by the time we got back and I was not looking forward to cramming a bagel in my mouth before the flight. But it was not going to be a problem as my sister's youngest, Natalie, had managed to get her hands into the cream cheese and "paint" all the remaining bagels with half eaten bagel particles and cream cheese. I threw the remaining bagels into the trash and hoped that they at least served peanuts on the flight.

Okay, people, I've been losing weight now for nearly four months and I still felt like a sardine rolled into a giant tin. Since when did airlines decide that the average person weighs like 100 pounds? You know, now that I think about it, I remember thinking airline seats were small when I was 100 pounds. Our flight boards, rolls out on to the tarmac, and then sits in a 30 minute delay while the kids become more and more apoplectic about the whole concept of vacation. Finally, we took off and in the case of the kids, I mean it. I saw the flight attendants roll their eyes as they looked at my adorable niece and nephew throwing a fit despite the best attempts of my sister and her husband to quiet them down.

There was a brief stopover in Dallas, and then we boarded another plane for Orlando. I only just managed to grab a cheeseburger at the Burger King when we landed. It wasn't on my diet, but hell, it was the only thing I'd eaten all day. I ended up sharing it with my nephew. We weren't in Dallas long enough to see any of the effects of Jack, but as we flew towards Orlando, the damage was visible from the air.

We arrived in Orlando right on schedule. The air was sultry and hot and I thought for sure that that was a bad sign - but the thunderstorms had already passed by for the day, so we were safe. We found our chartered bus driver waiting for us and we loaded all our bags and kids into the bus and were off in about twenty minutes. I was just joking with my sister that now that we were in Florida things were finally running smoothly when I heard the pop and hiss, and we had to pull over. Rather than wait for another bus, Dave and I climbed out onto the shoulder of the expressway with the driver and we put the spare on the bus. Even then, the driver was reluctant to take us the rest of the way. But we persuaded him with an extra large tip. As a result, we missed our stop at the grocery store - which made Heather irate since this was the only reason we'd rented the charter bus in the first place. We were a surly lot when we finally drove up in front of the Wilderness Lodge and disembarked from our trip to Hell.

One look at the lobby of this majestic hotel and the look of awe and wonder in the kids eyes however, made us all cool down and just enjoy the trip for what it was. The check in went smoothly and soon we were up in our rooms with a great view of nothing but wilderness all around. I think Heather had hoped to see the castle or something, but for me, this was what it was all about. Despite the SARS warning about the mosquitoes, I happily stood on the balcolny and just absorbed the nature through my pores.

We went swimming for a half hour before we all got dressed for a quick dinner at the Whispering Canyon Cafe where the kids were already drooping. Despite the fact that it was only 5pm back home, we were all exhausted and ready for a good night's sleep and we came up to the room.

Of course, I had to post a blog since Andy gave me this wonderful laptop for my birthday. Still don't know what posessed him - especially considering what he's gone through in the past three months. Sure enough, as I logged on just now there was an e-mail from him and his family. They've arrived at the Seminary and checked in. Soon to be Pastor Andy still hasn't had a chance to get a DSL account, but says that they're coming by to hook him up later this week. He wanted everyone to know that his kids have been enrolled in the local school and his wife has a nursing job already lined up. He'll be back online shortly. He said that Dan came down to help him move which was really cool, but considering Dan's access to the private jet from his new company, I guess its not as much of a burden any more.

Well, its getting late and I have a whole day of Disney adventures tomorrow to write about and I have to get up early for my jog (Yes, Sue, you task master, I'm running even on my vacation!). I also got an e-mail update from my agent, but I'll share that with you tomorrow. Take care everyone.

P.S. I can't believe the Giants have clinched the N.L. West so early this year! Whatever happened to the Dodgers?

Well, as you can see, that last line clinches it. This must be a real post from the future. I was surprised to discover that as I read this one, nine more blog posts appeared in my inbox - also from the future. So, come back tomorrow, to find out what happens next.

(P.S. You should read the comments from the future as well... but I'll let you add your own. Its hard to believe what happens to some of you in the future... ;)

Bad Analogy

Sometimes a writer can carry things too far in order to get a good analogy. On Saturday, in the on and off rain, Andy Lie and I hiked up a trail at Rockaway Beach. The trail was cold and dark. There were dark clouds on the horizons. And yet, I knew that I had to make this journey up the hill no matter how much the pain racked me. It was a long, arduous climb, but necessary. Because after reaching the top of the hill, I could look out over my life and see a new beginning. That is the way I was going to describe this hike. And thus it is true, from a certain perspective. But a thought just ran through me head a second ago that reminded me that nearly 2000 years ago, another man climbed up a dark hill to reach his destiny and to find a new and better beginning at the top. He, too, was racked with pain, but He also knew it was His destiny.

What makes this a particularly bad analogy, of course, is that my footsteps are nowhere near those of Jesus - thus to equate my soggy pain wracked out of shape suffering up a small hill journey to the one that Jesus made on the hill of Golgotha nearly 2000 years ago would be to stretch an analogy to its thinnest point in human existence. Though I believe suffering to be individually subjective, even I would have to agree that being cheeseburger impaired and excercise deprived and wet, does not in any way equate with that of being crucified. Only the most hyper of hypochondriacs could make that equation work.

I have taken my first steps towards the salvation of renewed life and vigor though, and in that, I am sure Jesus forgives me my bad analogy.

Friday's Resurrection Category

Name three things from your past, you wouldn't mind seeing come back to life? I.E. Sunday Afternoon Doubleheaders in Baseball (not some long lost pet that you really liked ;)

Have a Great Easter!

Crucify Him!

For nearly two thousand years, Christians blamed the Jews for the crucifiction of Jesus Christ. Here was our Lord and Savior, bruised and broken before the people, an innocent man, and the crowd cried out, "Crucify Him!" It must have been hard for people to believe that people could make such cavalier descisions about a man's life without first wanting to hear the evidence, without first considering the man's innocense, without first asking why the man had to die at all. Therefore, without a trial, we convicted the Jews, blamed them for killing Jesus, and condemned them to hatred and cruelty, torture and indifference, racism and genocide. It was only after the corpses of so many dead finally piled up at our feet that we realized what our blind disregard for fact had wrought. The death of one innocent man had not satiated our thirst, it had only made our desire grow that much more.

There is something to be said about the human desire to destroy. In our own lives, individually, we do things that only tear us down. We lie. We cheat. We steal. We know what is good, and we do evil anyway. We fight against this desire. We struggle against the chaos that threatens to overwhelm us. We search for help. We seek understanding and acceptance for the things we've done. But in the end, the human desire will find others that believe in the notion of safety in numbers - it must not be wrong if so many people are doing it. We find ourselves falling lock step in line with them, with their thinking, with their actions. If They say that this man is guilty, then by God, he must be guilty. And guilty people deserve to be punished. We must, for the good of all, Crucify Him!

I'd like to say that we've learned something in the last 2000 years. I'd like to say that since the evidence has shown and continues to show that this mob mentality is never a good thing, we have abandoned this destructive behavior. But the evidence is overwhelmingly against us as having done any form of evolving. If anything, with the reach of telecommunications and the internet into our lives, we have grown worse. We can now instantly attract a mob the second there is blood in the water and sway opinions far faster than evidence can even be gathered. We have become much more vindictive, much more destructive, much more likely to cry out, "Crucify Him!"

So as we commemorate that day, nearly 2000 years ago, where our Lord and Savior fulfilled His love for us by succumbing to our worst collective behavior, let us think on all those people we crucify in our own lives - that we convict without evidence and take pleasure in their demise - from the guy who cuts us off on the freeway to the man who may, or may not, have faked the evidence to send our country to war. If we circumvent justice, or by our very actions cause the circumventation of justice, then we are guilty. And Lord knows, when our time for Judgment comes, we are all going to want the chance to plead our case before a sympathetic jury.

Confidence

I have confidence in spring time.
I have confidence in rain.
I have confidence that spring will come again.
After which you'll see,
I have confidence in me.

Julie Andrews
Confidence
Sound of Music

I see that there are no takers on my sisters blog - Superstar in Training. She tried to give me away in her posting - Brother For Sale. There were only three comments - two from me, and none an impending proposal of marriage. But that's okay. I get it now. I understand the joke.

Nobody likes to realize that they've completely missed out on something. The second we discover that we have been oblivious to the obvious, we smack our heads and do our best Homer impersonation, "Doh!" Everyone else has been trying to point it out to us for days, weeks, months, or years. And then, one moment, the veil lifts and suddenly we see what has been clear to everyone else for a long time.

For me, this moment of grace occured the other night. I was popping pills in my bathroom at night and I happened to catch a sight of myself in the mirror. For the splittiest of seconds, I saw myself as others see me. It wasn't disgust that welled up in me, but pity - as in poor guy, what the hell happened to him? Yes, I'd gone to pot. I'd fallen by the wayside. I'd made myself unattractive. And not in a let's change the outfit kind of way, but in a full body disfigurement kind of way. It couldn't have been more obvious had I stretched my lip out of proportion with giant plates.

You would think that such a vision might crush whatever confidence I had in myself. Or you might think that it was exactly my lack of confidence that allowed me to see my body in such a low self-esteem kind of way. But the irony was, at that moment, I realized that I was better than this.

Nobody likes change. Nobody likes to go off into the unknown, or the known, with the expectation of difficult challenges ahead. For some reason we think that if we let the challenges come to us instead they will be easier to conquer. We let our health go. We push our bodies and our sanity to the limits because we're comfortable. We may sense that something is amiss. We may sense that things are wrong and need to be fixed, but we don't want to change anything. We like it where we are.

Over the years I've discovered some things about change. People recognize the need for change long before they do anything about it. First, they come to the realization that things need doing. Then they figure out a plan to change. Then they wait for just the right time to change. Then they find excuses for not changing. Then they wait some more. Then they threaten to change, again, and again, and again. Finally, something happens to move them off that rock where they've grown accustomed and forces them to seek change.

I can see the changes I need to make. I've seen them for years and I've ignored them. I've wanted to change for a long time. But to change, you have to more than just want it. You have to be dedicated to it. You have to have confidence that you can succeed.

I've had two fantasies in my life and they both seem mutually exclusive. One, to publish a novel. Two, to get married. Fantasies is all that they've ever been. I'm closer to making one of them come true now. I'm no closer to making the other one come true, but now I'm determined to try.

The thing about determination is that it must co-exist with confidence. There can not be one without the other. When I looked in that mirror, it didn't destroy my confidence, it fueled it - because it showed me that my body was rubbish, but that my spirit was still intact. I grew angry with myself for my foolishness and became determined to change. I knew that I had no confidence in the way I looked, because there was nothing to have confidence in. But that didn't matter because I still had confidence in myself. I still have confidence in my ability to turn it all around and to make myself something that even I can admire.

I am now determined to lose my bet with Andy, with all your help. I have confidence that God is watching me and is guiding me. I have seen the light. Now is not the time to consider change; now is the time to do it.

Bliss - Addendum

It is part of my hope for changing ICON that I no longer stand on the soapbox without offering concrete ideas for change. I forgot to include those ideas in my most recent posting. So, here is my addendum...

How does one change the world so that we can be a more sustainable society on this planet? Anthropologists and many other scientists will tell you that it is already too late. The carrying capacity for this planet has already been exceeded and short of killing off half the population of the planet (or more) there simply is no way to keep everyone alive equally. We have become locked in a race against time to see if we can beat the planet before it beats us. I disagree, but I think the changes that need to be made can't be made for the same reasons that we've done them in the past - there is no margin for profit, politics, or power. If we are going to change the planet for the good of all, then we must all benefit and share the burden equally.

Thinking on a microscale first, we need to reassess the way we view our planet. Instead of power being in the hands of the nations and wealth in the hands of individuals, we need to put power into the hands of local communities and wealth in the hands of the world. Instead of a top down approach, where the Federal Government is in charge of everything, we need a bottom up approach where the people tell the government what to do. If anyone should have Veto Power, it should be the American people. Allow each community to set its own standards, within a framework that allows all people to share in such basic principles of life as to eliminate all but the most petty arguments. I.E. The Feds say that all people will recycle. But each community decides how that is actually enforced. The Feds say that all people will receive a free education, but each community can decide what that actually means (within certain parameters). In theory, this is the way it is now. In practice, as money becomes involved, control is maintained at higher and higher levels. You will never hear of a local school teacher absconding with millions of dollars of Federal money, but you will always hear about teachers not having enough money to buy basic supplies like books, paper, and pens. This is a very backwards system.

Once we have turned our world into thinking first of the places we live and work, I think then we need a world government to start thinking of the issues of our human society at large. This planet is too small to carry us all. We need to expand and survive. Mars should be colonized. The Moon as well. And on into the other planets. Technology should be used to find means of keeping us fed, healthy, sheltered, and our environment cleaned. We need to begin to undo the damage we have done before our house falls down around us. We need to share information and rid the scientific communities of people who seek only to create destruction and disease. We need to rid the world of our shadow world of spies and secrets. We need to embrace truth, even harsh truth, and learn to forgive.

We are not all going to agree. There are deep seated divisions in the human race. We create some of those divisions ourselves. It is not enough for us to say our religion is the only truth. No. We must also destroy anyone who doesn't believe as we do. These things must stop. Genocide must become a thing of the past. Domination can no longer be allowed to occur. War must end.

I believe these things can happen. I believe we can turn the world around before its too late. I also believe that these things won't happen unless we want it so badly that we are willing to fight for it with all our might. God will help us, but we must pick up the cross first and bear the load.