The Conversation

I imagine the conversation went something like this...

Mr. President, thanks to the Patriot Act we are now virtually the greatest spies on the planet. There is almost nothing we don't know.

But there are things we don't know?

Well, yes, Mr. President. We're not omniscient. We can't, for instance, monitor the phone calls of American citizens.

Can Al Kiter monitor American phone calls?

With the right equipment - sure, Mr. President.

Can Al Kayter get access to everyone's e-mails and internet viewing patterns?

Mr. President, anything is possible, but I seriously...

Can Al Kidder gain access to social security numbers, bank account information, medical records and every single thing Americans consider private?

Of course, Mr. President, but...

Then that's what I want the U.S. to do. There's no way that Al Qiata should know more about my people than I do.

But there are laws...

Can Al Quintara get around the laws?

Well, yes, Mr. President, they can.

Then so can I. Nothing will prevent me from being one step ahead of those rascals this time.

With that amount of knowledge, Mr. President, we'll know more about Americans than anyone but God.

God?

Yes, Mr. President. After all, God knows the number of hairs on everyone's heads and what is in their hearts.

God knows this?

Yes, Mr. President.

Well, if God can find this out, I want to know it too... Get me the head of the NSA...

According to the news this morning, AT&T will start requiring their customers to allow AT&T to hand over their private information to the government whenever it asks. This will take effect on Friday. Either customers agree to this new privacy policy or they stop using AT&T. Those are your choices. There are only two words that come to mind at a time like this... Zeig Heil.