You can't corrupt those who don't read...

I was worried that this apology might offend my readers considering its R rated nature, then I realized that nobody reads my blog anyway, so it won't matter. ;)

I would like to apologize for a particular bane of human existence as its all based on a terrible typo that I made.

You see, I work for a particular company that sells pens. And I've been trying to sell one particular pen for a long time. Its been languishing in the doldrums for years now, just collecting dust. The problem is that this particular writing instrument is larger than other writing instruments, too big really to hold in your hand. And since most people prefer their writing implements small so that they can get a firm grip on them, well, this was a hard sell.

So, I had this idea for a mass marketing e-mail to help sell this particular item. I decided on a great headline, "'Embiggen your Pen!' is the rallying cry of a new generation!" Unfortunately, my overseas counterparts got the English translation wrong, and the headline instead read, "Embiggen your Penis the rallying cry of a new generation, which further got refined to, "Embiggen your penis - the rallying cry of a new generation," and finally just to "Embiggen your penis". This mass e-mail got sent to everyone, or so I hear, but people, naturally, refused to open it. And so they never got to find out about our pen.

More's the pity, because its a really great instrument and it really can do wonders for your sex life. Oh, I'm sorry... another typo there. What I meant to say was, it really can do wonders for your sec's life - as in secretary. What did you think I meant? ;)

This has been another cautionary tale from the fevered mind of Lanz Franco.