Climbing out of the valley

I had a day from Hell yesterday. I mean that literally. I was definitely walking through the dark valley, with no sunshine, and no chance of seeing the light at all. Thankfully, I was able to end the day without any major damage. But for a brief while there I was starting to sympathize with Job.

I finished writing really late Tuesday night. There was a chapter I just wanted to get done, and so I forced myself to finish it. But the problem with writing late is that I always need time to unwind afterwards. You get your brain working at a peak level of activity and it produces, but then you want to just shut it down cold as soon as you're done and it can't unstimulate so quickly. So I climbed into bed, physically exhausted but mentally doing gymnastics, and tossed and turned - my brain stimulating my body and vice versa. Then, to top it off, some mouse was burrowing in my walls to make a nest (it was rather cold) for the winter. It was well past 3am before I was finally able to convince the Extreme Nest Makeover unit to knock it off and I drifted off to sleep.

Four hours later, I woke up and dragged myself to work already despairing a long day of boring paperwork on little sleep. But shortly after I got here, I got a call from my accountant telling me that one of my credit cards had called to tell tales of unusual activity. I immediately called my credit card and we cancelled the card right away. Then, I spent an hour and a half changing my AOL password, before deciding to spend the rest of the day trying to eliminate a virus from my computer. All on four hour's sleep.

By the time I got home, I was ready to crash. But I forced myself to stay awake until 10pm, and then I just climbed back into my bed, pulled the warm covers over me, and slipped off into dreamy bliss.

Maybe its a thing you do as you get older - blaming God for your troubles. I used to read the Bible and wonder how these really righteous people could turn to God and ask, "My God, why have you forsaken me?" But now that I'm a little older, I start wondering when bad things happen - where is God out there? Why isn't He protecting me?

I know what the atheists would say, but they would be wrong. Instead, I turn to look at all the things that God did do for me yesterday.

I had a home to sleep in (and share with a nice but noisy mouse neighbor during the winter months). I had a car to drive and money to spend on gas (lots and lots of money). I had a job to go to that paid me money to spend on gas (less and less money). I had a computer to use that could get virused and software that allegedly prevented those viruses. I had a credit card that I could use to keep my gas guzzling car running. I had a family to return to and friends to read my blog. God has blessed me.

My God, my God, why hast thou been so good to me?

And then the sun shines through the clouds and illuminates even the darkest valleys.