I was going to reminisce about the one time in my life when I really got overlooked. It was in 1990/1 when I was in the Navy. To make a really long story short, I REALLY REALLY deserved recognition for stuff I was doing during the first couple of months of the Gulf War. My section leader thought so as well. He wrote up a long commendation recommendation listing all the things I'd done since the start of the war and turned it in for approval. When the list of commendations came out, my name was not included for our division - in fact, there were No Names listed for our division. When my section leader asked why nobody had been recognized during that quarter, his boss said that they didn't feel anyone had done anything special. When I heard that my efforts had not been recognized as anything worthwhile, I completely soured on the Navy, on my job, and on my division. Any chance that I might have stayed in the Navy disappeared right then and there.
After dreaming up this blistering screed, I went to work, but was too busy to post my scathing blog post. I went home after work, still ticked off.
Waiting for me in the mail when I got home was this letter:
Dear Will;
Thank you.
Over the past several years, PDA has seen thousands of volunteers from across the nation making a difference for disaster survivors... You have volunteered with Presbyterian Disaster Assistance, serving with survivors as they rebuild and recover... With your time and energy, your listening ears, and your presence, you have delivered renewed hope, joy, and the witness that Christ's love is unfailing. Please accept our deepest gratitude for your volunteer service...
Included was a Certificate of Appreciation suitable for hanging. I read it all and immediately burst into tears. I realized that not only had I been an idiot earlier that day, but that I had been craving the sort of recognition that is fleeting and unimportant. I did a good job in the Navy, sure, but the kind of recognition that I should have been craving is the kind that acknowledges love for fellow human beings. God answered my call for recognition with a powerful reply that made me feel proud and humble at the exact same moment.
The things that I did in Mississippi earlier this year, the things I hope to do in Kenya next year, are not the sorts of things that I want recognition for, and yet, they are the things I do that make me the most happy. A pat on the back at work is nice, but the smile of a person that I've helped is better than even the most generous of bonuses or raises.
I will put my certificate away now. I have received all the recognition I need - an immediate answer from God for my human craving for recognition.
2 comments:
You're right, of course. Nonetheless, we humans desire some acknowledgment that what we do means something in the long term. As I get older, I come to realize the truth of the Biblical injunction about storing treasures in heaven versus seeking the laurels of men. But it still sucks that the Navy lost a good sailor because of someone's inability to see the forest for the trees.
Cheers.
You know, the coolest recognition I ever got was a certificate from the red cross thanking me for helping out after the Loma Prieta earthquake. Not only does it remind me of how the community came together, but it reminds me of how I was able to help - even without having great strength or talents. I ran the elevator up and down the Parkmerced towers while residents moved their things in and out of condemned units. I told jokes the whole rides up and down. Everyone left my elevator with a smile. Later that evening, I brought meals to residents too frightened to open their doors. I was the first person some of them talked to - a gawky teenager. That certificate is one of my proudest accomplishments and I didn't do the work to even obtain the certificate. Just because it was the right thing to do.
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