Every October, my cross country coach would load up his camper shell backed truck with us gangly cross country runners and drive the short distance downhill from our campus to Golden Gate Park. Though it was good to spend time with other friendly runners, we also knew that this trip would be spent in serious discussion. Because after arriving at the Polo Grounds, we would begin to go over the San Francisco high school cross country course, step by step, transition by transition, pace by pace.
It would begin in the actual Polo Grounds - a half mile circle that we would traverse while our coach explained to us about how he wanted us to begin the race (Go out at your own pace. Do not try to be first, but try to be near first by the time you exit the Polo Grounds, etc...) Then we would pass under the outside horsetrack and into the park proper where we would start running the first outside stretch, tracing the curve of the polo grounds as we headed towards the first meadow. This stretch was always a little more difficult because Golden Gate Park is at a definite tilt, and so far we've been running flat. And when it got wet, especially, this was usually our first taste of a weathered course (i.e. Mud). As we ran along, our coach started to point out benchmarks, passing points, etc... And then down the short hill into the first meadow and across it (be sure to bypass any mud holes, he would say - a suggestion I would happily ignore for four years). Up the other side to the opposite side of the Polo Grounds, then a left turn to take us up the Park and east. This was the long uphill climb of the race.
We would run up the 3/4ths of a mile uphill spine of the course and then drop down another narrow hill to the backstop of a baseball diamond, around the baseball diamond, and up the second meadow to the big tree. Once around the big tree, we knew it was basically all down hill from there, and about 1.25 miles to go. Our coach would tell us that we had to start picking up the pace here. Down the other side of the meadow (some took the bike path, others the grass - either way was acceptable) and then back up a steep hill and then around a serious switchback and down another steephill right back on to the meadow. There was one last short hill after that, and then down through the first meadow again and back up and across the entrance to the Polo Grounds - opposite where we'd left it. After that, it was about 400 yards to the finish line. As we came off the steep hill, our coach would say that we really had to be going our fastest at that point, and that we should then save our final burst of speed until the finish line was less than 100 yards away and then sprint to the finish line.
Every year we went over this course and we knew it like the back of our hands. Then we would run the course about eight times a season, as well as practice on it another dozen or so times. By the time I was a senior, I had run the course close to 100 times and knew every intricate detail and nuance of its undulating path. I knew where to get an extra burst of speed. I knew how to run through the mud puddles without losing my shoes (thus bypassing all those slower runners who went around it). I knew where I could pass other runners and thoroughly demoralize them in the process. I knew all that, tucked away in my brain.
And yet, every single time out, I'd reach a point where I forgot all the strategy, all the plans, every skill I had, and every single bit of running I had ever known. I would toss it all to the wind and just run - feel the wind across my face, hear the pounding of my heart, feel the sting of sweat in my eyes, and push my legs forward like the drive wheels of a steam locomotive. At that moment, I stopped running and became a runner. I stopped thinking about running and just ran.
I reached that point with the novel. After four years and countless months of writing, notes, journals, plans, discussions, dialog, research, plotting, editing - I just reached down deep inside myself and stopped writing, and became a writer. It was pure guts, pure instinct, pure stamina that carried me to the end, and I crossed the finish line with nothing left inside me, having left it all behind somewhere in one of the endless meadows.
I have a tendency to plan things to death. At some point, I need to learn to let go and just be. All the strategy in the world won't help, if you don't go out there and run the race.
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Will Almighty
And lo, an Angel of the Lord appeared unto me, saying, "So, you think you're pretty hot stuff now that you've finished creating that book. How would you like a real challenge?"
"Bringeth iteth oneth," I replied.
"Stick to modern English before you hurt yourself," the Angel replied.
And thus I was transported into nothing - a big vast field of nothing.
"Where am I?" I asked.
"You are Before. God has suggested that you might want to try your hand at creating something a little more challenging - like the whole universe!"
"Hmm... Sure, why not? I'm in between gigs right now. I suppose I can take a week off."
And thus, following the great trend of Hollywood, Will Almighty set out to revamp the first couple of chapters of Genesis. And therefore it was that...
Genesis 1
1 - In the beginning, there was nada. 2 - And Will saw that he liked the nothing and began to plan what he would like to do with all that nothingness, that blank canvas (which is something not yet invented). 3 - The beginning and the end of the first day . 4 - On the second day, Will continued to contemplate all that nothingness and ate nachos (again with the not yet invented thing). 5 - The beginning and end of the second day. 6 - On the third day, Will decided that he needed to begin with a flourish and thus he created the heavens, the earth, the sun, the stars, the moon, and a giant space creature to destroy them all in a cataclysmic fireball, but after seeing his results, he scrapped the whole thing and went to bed early. 7 - The beginning and the end of the third day. 8 - On the fourth day, Will thought about going one better, and separated the lights from the darks, the colors from the socks, and did his laundry. Then he snapped his finger and the entire universe appeared as it had been before (minus plants, animals, and people) with the requisite 15% changes so that he could claim unique ownership. 9 - The beginning and the end of the fourth day. 10 - On the fifth day, Will decided to take a short break while he contemplated what to do next. 11 - The beginning and the end of the fifth day. 12 - On the 223rd day, Will thought about adding the color green. And he liked it. So it stayed. 13 - On the 435th day, Will created water and when it didn't kill him, he kept that too. 14 - On the 856th day, Will added birds, animals, and fishees. And they tasted good. So he kept them. But since he hadn't yet created insects (yuck) nor plant life (icky) they all died out. 15 - On the 857th day, Will begrudgingly created vegetables, but he countered this by also creating ice cream and chocolate syrup. 16 - On the 9,342nd day, Will made everything that was not a cheeseburger taste like chicken. 17 - On the 10,456th day, Will gave up.
And thus it was that Will's vast ego and his self important vision of himself as a master creater was completely destroyed with a single stunning sunset. Forever acknowledged as a failed creator, Will retired to a normal life of fiction wherein he could pretend to be a really, truly, awesome writer.
And as for the Angel, she eventually retired and started a detective agency in Los Angeles - but that's another story...
Amen
"Bringeth iteth oneth," I replied.
"Stick to modern English before you hurt yourself," the Angel replied.
And thus I was transported into nothing - a big vast field of nothing.
"Where am I?" I asked.
"You are Before. God has suggested that you might want to try your hand at creating something a little more challenging - like the whole universe!"
"Hmm... Sure, why not? I'm in between gigs right now. I suppose I can take a week off."
And thus, following the great trend of Hollywood, Will Almighty set out to revamp the first couple of chapters of Genesis. And therefore it was that...
Genesis 1
1 - In the beginning, there was nada. 2 - And Will saw that he liked the nothing and began to plan what he would like to do with all that nothingness, that blank canvas (which is something not yet invented). 3 - The beginning and the end of the first day . 4 - On the second day, Will continued to contemplate all that nothingness and ate nachos (again with the not yet invented thing). 5 - The beginning and end of the second day. 6 - On the third day, Will decided that he needed to begin with a flourish and thus he created the heavens, the earth, the sun, the stars, the moon, and a giant space creature to destroy them all in a cataclysmic fireball, but after seeing his results, he scrapped the whole thing and went to bed early. 7 - The beginning and the end of the third day. 8 - On the fourth day, Will thought about going one better, and separated the lights from the darks, the colors from the socks, and did his laundry. Then he snapped his finger and the entire universe appeared as it had been before (minus plants, animals, and people) with the requisite 15% changes so that he could claim unique ownership. 9 - The beginning and the end of the fourth day. 10 - On the fifth day, Will decided to take a short break while he contemplated what to do next. 11 - The beginning and the end of the fifth day. 12 - On the 223rd day, Will thought about adding the color green. And he liked it. So it stayed. 13 - On the 435th day, Will created water and when it didn't kill him, he kept that too. 14 - On the 856th day, Will added birds, animals, and fishees. And they tasted good. So he kept them. But since he hadn't yet created insects (yuck) nor plant life (icky) they all died out. 15 - On the 857th day, Will begrudgingly created vegetables, but he countered this by also creating ice cream and chocolate syrup. 16 - On the 9,342nd day, Will made everything that was not a cheeseburger taste like chicken. 17 - On the 10,456th day, Will gave up.
And thus it was that Will's vast ego and his self important vision of himself as a master creater was completely destroyed with a single stunning sunset. Forever acknowledged as a failed creator, Will retired to a normal life of fiction wherein he could pretend to be a really, truly, awesome writer.
And as for the Angel, she eventually retired and started a detective agency in Los Angeles - but that's another story...
Amen
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
It's not about me.
Every year for the past dozen years or so, we've had a sort of tradition in my family that you might as well call The Last Present tradition. It really started one year when my step mom got my dad a Learn to Paint kit complete with canvas and oil paint. The following Christmas as we just finished opening all of our presents, my dad said that he had one last present for my step mom to open. She opened the present and started to laugh. My dad had done his own interpretation of a beloved family icon - a paint by numbers Horse's Head that he'd painted as a kid in summer camp. The family joke had been going on for years that whenever my step mom took a painting down for cleaning or dusting or something, she would come back and find the space filled with this (hideous) paint by number's horse's head. Anyway, long story short, my dad had achieved the perfect mix of surprise and delight.
The following year he enlisted my aid in suprising her with a hand made doll house. The year after that it was my sister's turn to "surprise" everyone with the news of her engagement. And so on and so forth... Every year for years now, we've had that surprise moment at the end of Christmas.
This year I wanted to surprise everyone with the news that I had finally finished my novel. Not a great surprise, mind you, but a surprise nonetheless. I've been keeping the fact of my impending completion underwraps for months while I struggled through one of the most brutal scheduling periods of my life. I purposefully made it more difficult by adding the completion of the novel as a goal on top of everything else. My thought was to surprise everyone and feel their delight at the completion of this task. But as I approached the actual completion, I began to feel awkward about doing the surprise thing.
On the one hand, I knew it wasn't that big a deal. I've completed five different drafts of this thing - that it was the final one was noteworthy, but sort of like celebrating the completion of ROCKY after viewing Rocky VI. So I thought that making a big deal out of it would only serve to pump up my ego. Yes, it was a hard slog. Yes, I'm happy to be done with it (and good riddance ;) But I don't know that it was necessarily newsworthy, much less surprise worthy.
On the other hand, I had this notion in the back of my mind that Christmas shouldn't be about the biggest or the best gift. Its a notion that's been building in my mind for some time now. Christmas should be about Jesus and family and celebrating the idea that God cares for us. I actually began to look forward to a nice low key Christmas where I could put the enjoyment of others ahead of my own enjoyment.
The greatest gift I received this Christmas season was the completion of the book, not because of impending riches and untold wealth, but because I realized that there is a time to write about life and a time to absorb life. And for the first time in a long time, I am ready to absorb life. God has given me this wonderful gift and it has truly colored my new vision in ways that you can not imagine.
There's a line in the book that describes the main character as having a "psychic burr" that drives him to do the things that he does. I finally excersised my own psychic burr. And now I'm ready to simply enjoy the wonderful world that God gave me free of charge.
The following year he enlisted my aid in suprising her with a hand made doll house. The year after that it was my sister's turn to "surprise" everyone with the news of her engagement. And so on and so forth... Every year for years now, we've had that surprise moment at the end of Christmas.
This year I wanted to surprise everyone with the news that I had finally finished my novel. Not a great surprise, mind you, but a surprise nonetheless. I've been keeping the fact of my impending completion underwraps for months while I struggled through one of the most brutal scheduling periods of my life. I purposefully made it more difficult by adding the completion of the novel as a goal on top of everything else. My thought was to surprise everyone and feel their delight at the completion of this task. But as I approached the actual completion, I began to feel awkward about doing the surprise thing.
On the one hand, I knew it wasn't that big a deal. I've completed five different drafts of this thing - that it was the final one was noteworthy, but sort of like celebrating the completion of ROCKY after viewing Rocky VI. So I thought that making a big deal out of it would only serve to pump up my ego. Yes, it was a hard slog. Yes, I'm happy to be done with it (and good riddance ;) But I don't know that it was necessarily newsworthy, much less surprise worthy.
On the other hand, I had this notion in the back of my mind that Christmas shouldn't be about the biggest or the best gift. Its a notion that's been building in my mind for some time now. Christmas should be about Jesus and family and celebrating the idea that God cares for us. I actually began to look forward to a nice low key Christmas where I could put the enjoyment of others ahead of my own enjoyment.
The greatest gift I received this Christmas season was the completion of the book, not because of impending riches and untold wealth, but because I realized that there is a time to write about life and a time to absorb life. And for the first time in a long time, I am ready to absorb life. God has given me this wonderful gift and it has truly colored my new vision in ways that you can not imagine.
There's a line in the book that describes the main character as having a "psychic burr" that drives him to do the things that he does. I finally excersised my own psychic burr. And now I'm ready to simply enjoy the wonderful world that God gave me free of charge.
Friday, December 21, 2007
May your days be merry and bright...
And may all your Christmas's be white... okay, that's probably not the actual message I was going for here. Somehow that phrase, out of context, has some negative connotations. Er, um...
Anyway, Merry Christmas to you all and I hope to be back at this again in a few days with some post-holiday news.
Until then...
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Anyway, Merry Christmas to you all and I hope to be back at this again in a few days with some post-holiday news.
Until then...
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Forget the Old and New, we need a Current Testament *
I think so many people fall into the trap of believing that Christianity ended in something like 132AD and that everything that has happened since has been man's inexhaustable attempts to screw it up. There have been no new additions to the Bible since about that time and therefore anything we add to Christian literature is bound to be considered human, not holy.
But, of course, we know that there have been some very profound things said about God and the nature of love and Christianity since then. You could have an entire section of a Current Testament devoted to the various sayings and prayers of St. Francis, and an entire gospel according to C.S. Lewis or Deitrich Bonhoffer. But even then, in writing, we might have a tendency to codify our religion (St. Francis said it, therefore it must be true) as opposed to living our religion.
If anything is true in our need for a Current Testament, its this - rather than writing it down, we perform it. The beginning may have been the Word, but currently its the Deed.
My thoughts have been traveling down these paths lately because I've been reading the Old Testament again and, at the same time, a current book of theology. Its put me into a kind of temporal flux where I'm seeing Christianity from its ancestry and its progeny at the same time - the ultimate before and after picture. As a result I've been struck by two competing, but harmonious thoughts.
My first thought came from the reading of Genesis about Abraham. In that story, Abraham has a son, Ishmael, that he basically discards into the wilderness. "Don't worry," God tells Abraham, "I will make him into a great nation as well." It struck me that the Islamic faith believe themselves descended from Ishmael and that the sons of Ishmael and the sons of Isaac still don't get along after all these years. And yet, God promised each of them essentially the same thing. What if God had some intention for these two peoples that are much greater than anything we can possibly imagine? What if God sent us Jesus and them Mohammed? And what if there is some great reconciliation out there? This isn't to suggest that I am for the idea of a pluralistic view of God or that I accept a univeralistic view of God's grace. But I'm wondering, ultimately, if we don't all serve His view of the story and not our own - that there isn't some current chapter of the story that we're living and not reading.
My second thought follows the first, in some respect, in that it seems that there are a great many books out there right now that suggest that we've all got it wrong somehow - that there is a better way to worship God and we're not following it. Think about the plethora of "self-help" books out there for churches, congregations, or Christian individuals that each might as well be called, "Ten Ways To A More Religious You!" I'm currently reading one of them and I find the book compelling and interesting and, at times, convicting, but I was suddenly struck with the notion that this guy had no more of a clue about how religion should be done correctly than C.S. Lewis did. Ultimately, all of these "self-help" books are futile in that each of us will play our role in human history the way God intended (even if it means that we're going to read one of these books and be inspired by it to do... whatever.) God is writing the story and we are merely the characters involved.
I can't help but reading the old testament and new testament and think of the people in these books as characters, not living, breathing people. But then I have the same problem reading history books, or newspapers for that matter. Sometimes it's just hard to get out of one's own head. But the "characters" in the Bible and in history and in newspapers are real people, who breath, eat, drink, exist. And each of them has played some part in the world that was not of their choosing. Just like me. Their view of reality was/is the same as mine. They can only see what has happened behind them and can only predict what will come next and try to react to it. They will only know what is in their immediate presence as being fact. And even though most of them are long since dead, their lives form the soil that I walk upon, just as my life will one day form the soil of others yet to come.
And so we're left with an ongoing story of God - not a story of God in the past or a promise of God in the future, but a current story of God right now - an interactive story, a choose-your-own-adventure story, a living breathing testament to the one true God. And whether we are main characters or background characters or just window dressing to the main story, each of us is a part of this continuing story. Each of us is a part of the current testament to God.
* As testament is actually another word for covenant and therefore the designation actually means "Old Covenant with God, New Covenant with God" we don't really need a "Current Covenant with God". The Christ led one will suffice for us all. Therefore I use the term here more as a designation of time (as in Old Testament Times vs. New Testament Times).
But, of course, we know that there have been some very profound things said about God and the nature of love and Christianity since then. You could have an entire section of a Current Testament devoted to the various sayings and prayers of St. Francis, and an entire gospel according to C.S. Lewis or Deitrich Bonhoffer. But even then, in writing, we might have a tendency to codify our religion (St. Francis said it, therefore it must be true) as opposed to living our religion.
If anything is true in our need for a Current Testament, its this - rather than writing it down, we perform it. The beginning may have been the Word, but currently its the Deed.
My thoughts have been traveling down these paths lately because I've been reading the Old Testament again and, at the same time, a current book of theology. Its put me into a kind of temporal flux where I'm seeing Christianity from its ancestry and its progeny at the same time - the ultimate before and after picture. As a result I've been struck by two competing, but harmonious thoughts.
My first thought came from the reading of Genesis about Abraham. In that story, Abraham has a son, Ishmael, that he basically discards into the wilderness. "Don't worry," God tells Abraham, "I will make him into a great nation as well." It struck me that the Islamic faith believe themselves descended from Ishmael and that the sons of Ishmael and the sons of Isaac still don't get along after all these years. And yet, God promised each of them essentially the same thing. What if God had some intention for these two peoples that are much greater than anything we can possibly imagine? What if God sent us Jesus and them Mohammed? And what if there is some great reconciliation out there? This isn't to suggest that I am for the idea of a pluralistic view of God or that I accept a univeralistic view of God's grace. But I'm wondering, ultimately, if we don't all serve His view of the story and not our own - that there isn't some current chapter of the story that we're living and not reading.
My second thought follows the first, in some respect, in that it seems that there are a great many books out there right now that suggest that we've all got it wrong somehow - that there is a better way to worship God and we're not following it. Think about the plethora of "self-help" books out there for churches, congregations, or Christian individuals that each might as well be called, "Ten Ways To A More Religious You!" I'm currently reading one of them and I find the book compelling and interesting and, at times, convicting, but I was suddenly struck with the notion that this guy had no more of a clue about how religion should be done correctly than C.S. Lewis did. Ultimately, all of these "self-help" books are futile in that each of us will play our role in human history the way God intended (even if it means that we're going to read one of these books and be inspired by it to do... whatever.) God is writing the story and we are merely the characters involved.
I can't help but reading the old testament and new testament and think of the people in these books as characters, not living, breathing people. But then I have the same problem reading history books, or newspapers for that matter. Sometimes it's just hard to get out of one's own head. But the "characters" in the Bible and in history and in newspapers are real people, who breath, eat, drink, exist. And each of them has played some part in the world that was not of their choosing. Just like me. Their view of reality was/is the same as mine. They can only see what has happened behind them and can only predict what will come next and try to react to it. They will only know what is in their immediate presence as being fact. And even though most of them are long since dead, their lives form the soil that I walk upon, just as my life will one day form the soil of others yet to come.
And so we're left with an ongoing story of God - not a story of God in the past or a promise of God in the future, but a current story of God right now - an interactive story, a choose-your-own-adventure story, a living breathing testament to the one true God. And whether we are main characters or background characters or just window dressing to the main story, each of us is a part of this continuing story. Each of us is a part of the current testament to God.
* As testament is actually another word for covenant and therefore the designation actually means "Old Covenant with God, New Covenant with God" we don't really need a "Current Covenant with God". The Christ led one will suffice for us all. Therefore I use the term here more as a designation of time (as in Old Testament Times vs. New Testament Times).
Monday, December 17, 2007
Delayed Reaction
At 11:59pm last night I finished working on all of my projects for the entire winter season and semester. My two films, two papers, two sound projects and other projects were all done. I had been working solidly since Thanksgiving, and even longer on most of the projects. My average sleep for the past three weeks had been around 6 hours a night (nothing like Ariel, but still...) and my total output had been just shy of incredible - even for me. And when I finally shut down my computer and stared straight ahead, I wondered how I should feel about completing all this work.
I was tired. That was how I felt. Not overjoyed, not elated, not ready to celebrate or scream for joy. I wasn't about to run out into the street and send a goose to Tiny Tim for Christmas. I wasn't about to run twelve blocks to ask Sally to marry me. I wasn't about to throw my sword across a field and cry, "FREEDOM!" No. I just say there and said, "I'm tired. I think I'll go to bed now." Kind of like Forrest Gump after running across the country three times in a row.
I got up from my desk, walked into the bathroom, and started to brush my teeth. And as I stood there and looked into the mirror at my puffy face and bloodshot eyes, the enormity of all those projects and all those deadlines met, and the very real notion that I'd done good work, if not great work, hit me and I suddenly felt this overwhelming feeling of true gratitude to God for having pulled me through it all. It was like getting to the top of a nasty hill and then suddenly looking down to see that Jesus had been carrying you the entire time. My eyes welled up with tears, which was really annoying as I had a vibrating toothbrush in my mouth at the time, and I started to praise God for all my blessings.
Its hard sometimes to read the Old Testament and remember the God that inscribed His law in my heart. Reading and rereading all those rules and regulations and trying to imagine that there isn't some egotistic perfectionist God out there telling the Israelites how its gotta be is a hard thing to do when you read the Pentatuch (double word score bonus for Hebrew words). You wonder why God seems to be telling the Israelites how to worship Him. And then, you get a reminder of how God can bestow blessings in your life, and you suddenly feel that He is worth every ounce of praise He receives and then some. Then its not so hard to imagine that an entire people, brought out of Egypt and fed and watered daily, might want to worship God.
But here's the thing... here's the metaphor... the wilderness of Sinai is something we carry with us all the time, and without food or water or God, we will perish in our wilderness of society as well. God is there to provide for us. And, as a result, we should praise him and worship him for all the wonderful things He does, but also for the basics of life. We are all His people. And once we remember that, we will be allowed to claim our inheritance.
This post is all over the place, but that's kind of how it tumbled into my head and heart last night - only much faster and in a jumble. I felt it and thought it all at the same time. And when God reveals his truth to me, its so wonderful that my body can not contain it all at once and tears of joy spill out.
I call those moments, my Holy Spirit moments. And I half expect to look in the mirror and see a flame over my head and to hear myself speaking in tongues.
So the end result is that I am finally done. I am still tired. And I am filled with the love and praise of Christ Almighty. And all just in time for Christmas.
Amen.
I was tired. That was how I felt. Not overjoyed, not elated, not ready to celebrate or scream for joy. I wasn't about to run out into the street and send a goose to Tiny Tim for Christmas. I wasn't about to run twelve blocks to ask Sally to marry me. I wasn't about to throw my sword across a field and cry, "FREEDOM!" No. I just say there and said, "I'm tired. I think I'll go to bed now." Kind of like Forrest Gump after running across the country three times in a row.
I got up from my desk, walked into the bathroom, and started to brush my teeth. And as I stood there and looked into the mirror at my puffy face and bloodshot eyes, the enormity of all those projects and all those deadlines met, and the very real notion that I'd done good work, if not great work, hit me and I suddenly felt this overwhelming feeling of true gratitude to God for having pulled me through it all. It was like getting to the top of a nasty hill and then suddenly looking down to see that Jesus had been carrying you the entire time. My eyes welled up with tears, which was really annoying as I had a vibrating toothbrush in my mouth at the time, and I started to praise God for all my blessings.
Its hard sometimes to read the Old Testament and remember the God that inscribed His law in my heart. Reading and rereading all those rules and regulations and trying to imagine that there isn't some egotistic perfectionist God out there telling the Israelites how its gotta be is a hard thing to do when you read the Pentatuch (double word score bonus for Hebrew words). You wonder why God seems to be telling the Israelites how to worship Him. And then, you get a reminder of how God can bestow blessings in your life, and you suddenly feel that He is worth every ounce of praise He receives and then some. Then its not so hard to imagine that an entire people, brought out of Egypt and fed and watered daily, might want to worship God.
But here's the thing... here's the metaphor... the wilderness of Sinai is something we carry with us all the time, and without food or water or God, we will perish in our wilderness of society as well. God is there to provide for us. And, as a result, we should praise him and worship him for all the wonderful things He does, but also for the basics of life. We are all His people. And once we remember that, we will be allowed to claim our inheritance.
This post is all over the place, but that's kind of how it tumbled into my head and heart last night - only much faster and in a jumble. I felt it and thought it all at the same time. And when God reveals his truth to me, its so wonderful that my body can not contain it all at once and tears of joy spill out.
I call those moments, my Holy Spirit moments. And I half expect to look in the mirror and see a flame over my head and to hear myself speaking in tongues.
So the end result is that I am finally done. I am still tired. And I am filled with the love and praise of Christ Almighty. And all just in time for Christmas.
Amen.
Friday, December 14, 2007
Sustainable Futures
There's probably an ah ha out there and a I told you so. But if there is, I don't remember them.
The first Dams were built not with the idea of hydro-electric power or watermills or anything useful in mind, so much as a way to keep the countryside from flooding. The feast or famile approach to existence was a very primitive but necessary way of life, since they had no concept of dams yet. Once the dam was invented and people could keep themselves from becoming inundated, agriculture could thrive and modern society could really develop.
I've been pondering that lately as I approach modern life.
I wrote earlier this fall at the almost perfect storm of a schedule that I was contemplating. So far, I've managed to weather most of the storm and am happy to say that by this time next week, I will be in clear skies and sailing free. I'm not adverse to a little weather from time to time, but the past couple of months, and especially the past six weeks, have taught me that if you can avoid being inundated you ought to do that.
And so, in my idle moments now while I wrap up the few remaining projects that I still have to do (and ponder all that Christmas shopping I have yet to even contemplate) I am beginning to imagine a sustainable future wherein I don't overimmerse myself in projects and plans. I am trying to contemplate a slow and sustainable rate of growth insted of throwing all projects on the fire at once.
Nobody knows what the future holds for them, of course, but I'd like to be prepared to tackle things on my own terms as much as possible. So the planning for the future begins and the dam thing better work.
The first Dams were built not with the idea of hydro-electric power or watermills or anything useful in mind, so much as a way to keep the countryside from flooding. The feast or famile approach to existence was a very primitive but necessary way of life, since they had no concept of dams yet. Once the dam was invented and people could keep themselves from becoming inundated, agriculture could thrive and modern society could really develop.
I've been pondering that lately as I approach modern life.
I wrote earlier this fall at the almost perfect storm of a schedule that I was contemplating. So far, I've managed to weather most of the storm and am happy to say that by this time next week, I will be in clear skies and sailing free. I'm not adverse to a little weather from time to time, but the past couple of months, and especially the past six weeks, have taught me that if you can avoid being inundated you ought to do that.
And so, in my idle moments now while I wrap up the few remaining projects that I still have to do (and ponder all that Christmas shopping I have yet to even contemplate) I am beginning to imagine a sustainable future wherein I don't overimmerse myself in projects and plans. I am trying to contemplate a slow and sustainable rate of growth insted of throwing all projects on the fire at once.
Nobody knows what the future holds for them, of course, but I'd like to be prepared to tackle things on my own terms as much as possible. So the planning for the future begins and the dam thing better work.
Friday, December 07, 2007
How would THAT look under the tree?
A little light Friday after a long week...
Occasionally I read the subject lines of spam e-mail and I can't help but wondering if the e-mail is as creative as the headline. But the one I just saw made me smile even though I immediately erased it.
It read: "Santa will make your willie stronger and thicker."
This sudden explosion (pardon the pun) of hoohaa related spams has at least made the purveyors of spamdom start thinking creatively to get people to open their e-mails. I've hand promises of all kinds about strengthening my rope, extending my reach, thickening my third leg, etc... But to me, there are flaws in the basic approach to the spam. The flaws are similar to those messages you see at the beginning of DVD's, "This program has been modified to fit your TV screen." How do they know how big my screen is? How do they know it needs to be modified? I'm quite happy with my screen. It can do the job just fine, giving me robust color and powerful channel reception, and if I want to enjoy the privacy of my screen in my own home, I can do that too. So keep your program modification out of my home, damn you! Oh wait... what was I talking about again?
Oh, that's right... Santa. Imagine him carrying this thing around in his sleigh and then trying to shove it down a chimminey. Too painful? Probably.
I'm getting out while the getting is good.
Have a nice weekend.
Occasionally I read the subject lines of spam e-mail and I can't help but wondering if the e-mail is as creative as the headline. But the one I just saw made me smile even though I immediately erased it.
It read: "Santa will make your willie stronger and thicker."
This sudden explosion (pardon the pun) of hoohaa related spams has at least made the purveyors of spamdom start thinking creatively to get people to open their e-mails. I've hand promises of all kinds about strengthening my rope, extending my reach, thickening my third leg, etc... But to me, there are flaws in the basic approach to the spam. The flaws are similar to those messages you see at the beginning of DVD's, "This program has been modified to fit your TV screen." How do they know how big my screen is? How do they know it needs to be modified? I'm quite happy with my screen. It can do the job just fine, giving me robust color and powerful channel reception, and if I want to enjoy the privacy of my screen in my own home, I can do that too. So keep your program modification out of my home, damn you! Oh wait... what was I talking about again?
Oh, that's right... Santa. Imagine him carrying this thing around in his sleigh and then trying to shove it down a chimminey. Too painful? Probably.
I'm getting out while the getting is good.
Have a nice weekend.
Thursday, December 06, 2007
A Good and Faithful Servant Returns Home
I just found out from my sister today that my Aunt Jane passed away recently. Apparently there were some communications issues and we just found out about it yesterday - after the funeral. And that's all right with me.
My Aunt Jane was just about the most religious person I know. She was the kind of woman who used to let us kids read those Catholic comic books that depicted the Bible stories in graphic detail and where a priest would fight off demons to protect unborn fetuses from being aborted. But there wasn't a hint of hypocrisy in her body. She was a real believer and a real wonderful woman, and one of the kindest relatives I can remember ever having.
She owned a big old house in Oakland and we used to go over and visit her when we were younger. Then my Mom got sick and we would visit less and less often. But when my Mom was better, she actually went and lived with my Aunt and had a small number of rooms to herself on the lower floors, and we kids were able to spend Christmas with our Mom. I always loved that house. It seemed to take on the character of my aunt - prim, proper, and kind. I can't explain it.
I last saw my aunt about ten years ago. She was in her 80's then and still going on strong, but she was going to sell the house and move into an assisted living center. I guess I didn't know that it would be the last time I saw her, but I'm not sure it would have made much of a difference. I gave her a hug and thanked her as I left and she smiled and thanked me for coming and I felt like she meant it.
She was 93. And now she has finally returned home to be with the Lord who loves her. I will miss her, but I'm pretty sure she's where she always wanted to be in the first place.
Please send out a prayer for my Aunt and for her loved ones who might still be grieving.
My Aunt Jane was just about the most religious person I know. She was the kind of woman who used to let us kids read those Catholic comic books that depicted the Bible stories in graphic detail and where a priest would fight off demons to protect unborn fetuses from being aborted. But there wasn't a hint of hypocrisy in her body. She was a real believer and a real wonderful woman, and one of the kindest relatives I can remember ever having.
She owned a big old house in Oakland and we used to go over and visit her when we were younger. Then my Mom got sick and we would visit less and less often. But when my Mom was better, she actually went and lived with my Aunt and had a small number of rooms to herself on the lower floors, and we kids were able to spend Christmas with our Mom. I always loved that house. It seemed to take on the character of my aunt - prim, proper, and kind. I can't explain it.
I last saw my aunt about ten years ago. She was in her 80's then and still going on strong, but she was going to sell the house and move into an assisted living center. I guess I didn't know that it would be the last time I saw her, but I'm not sure it would have made much of a difference. I gave her a hug and thanked her as I left and she smiled and thanked me for coming and I felt like she meant it.
She was 93. And now she has finally returned home to be with the Lord who loves her. I will miss her, but I'm pretty sure she's where she always wanted to be in the first place.
Please send out a prayer for my Aunt and for her loved ones who might still be grieving.
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Inspiration costs more!
I've been smashing my head against the wall since Sunday trying to figure out what to do about my half completed film now that my actors are no longer able to help me finish it and the deadline is two weeks from today. Though I've head plenty of ideas, none of them really sat right with me, as the film was a complicated mix of religion, humor and bizarreness that worked together. Replacing one moment of bizarreness for another wouldn't necessarily work. The elements all had to fit together to work.
I was finally at that point today when I was ready to set my mind to a particular idea that would finish the film, but wouldn't make a great film. I was just going about figuring out the logistics of this new idea - what footage I would need, what new props, etc... when I suddenly had a very funny vision and my mind seized upon it.
Though I had an idea and it would have worked, it wasn't the genius solution I had been hoping for. This new idea is genius. By holding out as long as I did, I was able to arrive at the idea that I really needed.
Which just goes to show you, ideas are cheap. Inspiration costs more.
I was finally at that point today when I was ready to set my mind to a particular idea that would finish the film, but wouldn't make a great film. I was just going about figuring out the logistics of this new idea - what footage I would need, what new props, etc... when I suddenly had a very funny vision and my mind seized upon it.
Though I had an idea and it would have worked, it wasn't the genius solution I had been hoping for. This new idea is genius. By holding out as long as I did, I was able to arrive at the idea that I really needed.
Which just goes to show you, ideas are cheap. Inspiration costs more.
Monday, December 03, 2007
Getting Old Isn't All Bad
Item: I had an early senior moment on Sunday. I was reading one of the hymns in church and my mind did one of those old people things and I suddenly had to chuckle because instead of praising the truine God, I was praising the Itune God ;)
Item: I had an extremely unproductive weekend. In terms of school disasters, it ranked right up there with the time that my two part 64 page epic short story got erased before I could print it out for school and I had to start over from scratch with a week left before it was due (as I recall it came out better, but we won't go there). I was trying to finish my film this weekend with three actors. One of the three actors kept telling me that he'd be there, but when I was ready with everyone else and the equipment he bailed on me - not once, but twice! In both cases I had to apologize to the other actors and send them on their way, but in the meantime, I wasted my entire weekend getting nothing done. To say that I was mad was an understatement. But one of the nice things about getting older is that I find it easier to have my anger assuaged. After my team finished first in The Amazing Race, I suddenly realized that I was no longer mad. I don't think I've ever felt so angry about something and then came to a true sense of peace about it in so short a period of time in my life. But God knew that I needed to get to that place, so He simply took away my anger. That's the best description I can give for it. There were more important matters on God's agenda than me being mad. And so, all is forgiven and forgotten. And now comes the question of how to put this bloody film mess back together again in so short a time.
Item: I had the distinct pleasure of watching my Dad and my Uncle (both old enough to know better) get in trouble this weekend. It wasn't one of those serious kinds of trouble, more of a scolding, but it was like one of those deja vu moments from my childhood only in reverse. Very character revealing.
Item: My brother hit a major rough patch in his life when he turned 40 this year. He's fast approaching his 41st birthday and I'd like to say that his life has never been better. My brother can be a real jerk sometimes, but when he isn't, he's one of the coolest guys I know. I mention this mostly because 40 is still two years away for me, and I'd like to think that I'll approach it with grace and dignity. But I'm worried that I'll freak out and succumb to some sort of mid-life crisis like others have. As a writer who lives in his head a little too much, the possibility definitely exists. I hope you'll all be around to straighten me out if I should get a little bent.
Item: It's easier to keep secrets as you get older. As these are the holidays, that's all I'm going to say for now.
Have a good week and remember that it is both fitting and wonderful to follow the Itune God. ;)
Item: I had an extremely unproductive weekend. In terms of school disasters, it ranked right up there with the time that my two part 64 page epic short story got erased before I could print it out for school and I had to start over from scratch with a week left before it was due (as I recall it came out better, but we won't go there). I was trying to finish my film this weekend with three actors. One of the three actors kept telling me that he'd be there, but when I was ready with everyone else and the equipment he bailed on me - not once, but twice! In both cases I had to apologize to the other actors and send them on their way, but in the meantime, I wasted my entire weekend getting nothing done. To say that I was mad was an understatement. But one of the nice things about getting older is that I find it easier to have my anger assuaged. After my team finished first in The Amazing Race, I suddenly realized that I was no longer mad. I don't think I've ever felt so angry about something and then came to a true sense of peace about it in so short a period of time in my life. But God knew that I needed to get to that place, so He simply took away my anger. That's the best description I can give for it. There were more important matters on God's agenda than me being mad. And so, all is forgiven and forgotten. And now comes the question of how to put this bloody film mess back together again in so short a time.
Item: I had the distinct pleasure of watching my Dad and my Uncle (both old enough to know better) get in trouble this weekend. It wasn't one of those serious kinds of trouble, more of a scolding, but it was like one of those deja vu moments from my childhood only in reverse. Very character revealing.
Item: My brother hit a major rough patch in his life when he turned 40 this year. He's fast approaching his 41st birthday and I'd like to say that his life has never been better. My brother can be a real jerk sometimes, but when he isn't, he's one of the coolest guys I know. I mention this mostly because 40 is still two years away for me, and I'd like to think that I'll approach it with grace and dignity. But I'm worried that I'll freak out and succumb to some sort of mid-life crisis like others have. As a writer who lives in his head a little too much, the possibility definitely exists. I hope you'll all be around to straighten me out if I should get a little bent.
Item: It's easier to keep secrets as you get older. As these are the holidays, that's all I'm going to say for now.
Have a good week and remember that it is both fitting and wonderful to follow the Itune God. ;)
Thursday, November 29, 2007
McCain Pushes To Put Jesus On Dollar Bill
SALT LAKE CITY (CAP) - Republican Presidential candidate John McCain today called upon the United States to pay homage to its alleged Christian roots by replacing George Washington on the $1 bill with a more appropriate image, that of Jesus Christ.
The plea surprised some political analysts, who had assumed that McCain's reference to the U.S. as a 'Christian nation' in a recent Beliefnet interview was nothing more than pandering to the base.
"I dunno, maybe he did get loopy for the Lord somewhere out there on the Straight-Talk Express," one reporter told CAP News. "I had to cover that thing for two days in June, and I know I was praying to get the hell off."
Speaking at the annual Cattlemen for Christ convention in Salt Lake City, McCain said that his first act upon becoming President would be to sign into law a provision that would strip the $1 bill of the country's famous founder and replace it with "the nation's true spiritual founder, our Lord Jesus Christ."
"The beautiful thing about the $1 bill is that even the poor can afford them, just like they can afford the teachings of Jesus," McCain said to boisterous mooing. "Some think we should call it Messiah Money or Christ Cash, but I'm personally in favor of a shift in emphasis, from the one dollar bill to The One dollar bill."
While critics were quick to quietly question McCain's motives and the costs associated with such a massive overhaul of the nation's most popular currency bill, McCain's fellow Republican Presidential candidates were left scrambling to one-up the senator with their own monetary proposals.
The race's only Mormon, former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney, said he would put a smiling Jesus on multiple bills, noting, "I want to see the same thing when I open my wallet as I do when I open my bedroom door: many smiling faces."
For former New York mayor and terrorism-survivor Rudy Giuliani, Jesus would only adorn the $20 bill.
"What is 20? 9+11. Need I say more?" Giuliani said.
Bypassing Jesus entirely and heading right to the nation's first Republican saint, Fred Thompson would put a picture of Ronald Reagan on "some bill, I don't know, we're looking into it."
The plea surprised some political analysts, who had assumed that McCain's reference to the U.S. as a 'Christian nation' in a recent Beliefnet interview was nothing more than pandering to the base.
"I dunno, maybe he did get loopy for the Lord somewhere out there on the Straight-Talk Express," one reporter told CAP News. "I had to cover that thing for two days in June, and I know I was praying to get the hell off."
Speaking at the annual Cattlemen for Christ convention in Salt Lake City, McCain said that his first act upon becoming President would be to sign into law a provision that would strip the $1 bill of the country's famous founder and replace it with "the nation's true spiritual founder, our Lord Jesus Christ."
"The beautiful thing about the $1 bill is that even the poor can afford them, just like they can afford the teachings of Jesus," McCain said to boisterous mooing. "Some think we should call it Messiah Money or Christ Cash, but I'm personally in favor of a shift in emphasis, from the one dollar bill to The One dollar bill."
While critics were quick to quietly question McCain's motives and the costs associated with such a massive overhaul of the nation's most popular currency bill, McCain's fellow Republican Presidential candidates were left scrambling to one-up the senator with their own monetary proposals.
The race's only Mormon, former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney, said he would put a smiling Jesus on multiple bills, noting, "I want to see the same thing when I open my wallet as I do when I open my bedroom door: many smiling faces."
For former New York mayor and terrorism-survivor Rudy Giuliani, Jesus would only adorn the $20 bill.
"What is 20? 9+11. Need I say more?" Giuliani said.
Bypassing Jesus entirely and heading right to the nation's first Republican saint, Fred Thompson would put a picture of Ronald Reagan on "some bill, I don't know, we're looking into it."
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
You can't corrupt those who don't read...
I was worried that this apology might offend my readers considering its R rated nature, then I realized that nobody reads my blog anyway, so it won't matter. ;)
I would like to apologize for a particular bane of human existence as its all based on a terrible typo that I made.
You see, I work for a particular company that sells pens. And I've been trying to sell one particular pen for a long time. Its been languishing in the doldrums for years now, just collecting dust. The problem is that this particular writing instrument is larger than other writing instruments, too big really to hold in your hand. And since most people prefer their writing implements small so that they can get a firm grip on them, well, this was a hard sell.
So, I had this idea for a mass marketing e-mail to help sell this particular item. I decided on a great headline, "'Embiggen your Pen!' is the rallying cry of a new generation!" Unfortunately, my overseas counterparts got the English translation wrong, and the headline instead read, "Embiggen your Penis the rallying cry of a new generation, which further got refined to, "Embiggen your penis - the rallying cry of a new generation," and finally just to "Embiggen your penis". This mass e-mail got sent to everyone, or so I hear, but people, naturally, refused to open it. And so they never got to find out about our pen.
More's the pity, because its a really great instrument and it really can do wonders for your sex life. Oh, I'm sorry... another typo there. What I meant to say was, it really can do wonders for your sec's life - as in secretary. What did you think I meant? ;)
This has been another cautionary tale from the fevered mind of Lanz Franco.
I would like to apologize for a particular bane of human existence as its all based on a terrible typo that I made.
You see, I work for a particular company that sells pens. And I've been trying to sell one particular pen for a long time. Its been languishing in the doldrums for years now, just collecting dust. The problem is that this particular writing instrument is larger than other writing instruments, too big really to hold in your hand. And since most people prefer their writing implements small so that they can get a firm grip on them, well, this was a hard sell.
So, I had this idea for a mass marketing e-mail to help sell this particular item. I decided on a great headline, "'Embiggen your Pen!' is the rallying cry of a new generation!" Unfortunately, my overseas counterparts got the English translation wrong, and the headline instead read, "Embiggen your Penis the rallying cry of a new generation, which further got refined to, "Embiggen your penis - the rallying cry of a new generation," and finally just to "Embiggen your penis". This mass e-mail got sent to everyone, or so I hear, but people, naturally, refused to open it. And so they never got to find out about our pen.
More's the pity, because its a really great instrument and it really can do wonders for your sex life. Oh, I'm sorry... another typo there. What I meant to say was, it really can do wonders for your sec's life - as in secretary. What did you think I meant? ;)
This has been another cautionary tale from the fevered mind of Lanz Franco.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
I'm tired of being reasonable
I know the Good Book says to love my enemies, but first I have to admit that I have enemies. The people that hack me off the most are any unreasonable, over compensating, individuals or groups who are the enemies of all things that I hold dear - fair play, honesty, freedom, love, and God. Right now, one group in particular has made me very angry.
To those people who have arrested a teacher in Sudan because her students named a teddy bear Muhammad (after a boy in class, by the way) you need to grow up and get a life or Allah is going to personally spank you for being brats. A Teddy Bear is not the prophet. Nobody but you seems to think that this is an insult to the prophet. While I didn't agree with your stance on the whole Danish cartoon thing, I at least understood where you were coming from in that argument. In this one, you're just plain wrong. Period. End of line.
So grow up and release the teacher! Or you will have the enmity of at least one American and probably a great many other reasonable human beings raining down on you in the near future.
P.S. I still love you even though it hurts my heart.
To those people who have arrested a teacher in Sudan because her students named a teddy bear Muhammad (after a boy in class, by the way) you need to grow up and get a life or Allah is going to personally spank you for being brats. A Teddy Bear is not the prophet. Nobody but you seems to think that this is an insult to the prophet. While I didn't agree with your stance on the whole Danish cartoon thing, I at least understood where you were coming from in that argument. In this one, you're just plain wrong. Period. End of line.
So grow up and release the teacher! Or you will have the enmity of at least one American and probably a great many other reasonable human beings raining down on you in the near future.
P.S. I still love you even though it hurts my heart.
Monday, November 26, 2007
Prepare to be impressed!
The Definitive Answer on Free Will and Why Time Travel Is Impossible!
A Scholarly Treatise of Immense Religious And Scientific Importance!
Read It Now And Nominate Me For Whatever Nobel Prize I Deserve!
Okay, maybe its not all that hype worthy, because it depends so much on faith and not a whole lot on science, except that if you believe one, then the other must follow.
Here's how it all begins - Exodus, Chapter (10-11, somewhere in there). God through Moses through Aaron baits Pharoah - let my people go or... fill in nasty plague here. If you don't, then I will surely send a plague of locusts, etc... tomorrow. So, here's the thing that drives me nuts. My NIV Bible tries to explain away this judgment from God as making perfectly logical sense based on the time of year, the previous plague and other atmospheric data, and, the tendency of locusts, flies, floods, etc... to occur in Egypt all the time. As if it were that simple. But then it occurs to me, okay - even if that were the case, how did God know that such a plague would occur at precisely that time? And if it was going to occur naturally anyway, what if Pharoah had said, "Okay, you win. Take your people and go?" Would God have been able to stop a naturally occuring plague from striking if all He was doing was looking into the future and seeing something that was going to happen anyway? But if God knew what was going to happen in the future, what does that do with our free will? Questions without answers, it seems, until I finally figured something out.
The key to the whole thing is that we were made in God's image. God gave us free will, but God never claimed that He didn't also have free will. You've got free will, but doesn't it feel like sometimes you have no choice but to do X even though you don't want to? Other people can, one by one, strip you of your options until you only have one choice that day. Its either do X or die. But you still have Free Will. You can always choose to die - you still have that other choice. So if, with our own free will, we can limit the choices of others to the point where they only have one real option left to them - i.e. do what we want them to do - then why can't we also prescribe to God the exact same ability?
Add to this ability of free will is God's omniscience. He knows everything, he sees everything, and he knows how its all going to come out. God can see the future and He can rig it so that all the good people win and all the bad people lose by using His free will to subtly make things so that you have a very limited number of choices (good or bad, right or wrong, God or... oblivion). Ultimately, its up to you to make that choice. Ultimately, you have free will - even if the choice you're going to make is known by God in advance.
Pharoah could choose to let the Hebrews go at any time he wants, but God already knows that Pharoah won't until after Passover. He's looked ahead and seen what's coming in Chapter 12 even while we're back at Chapter 5. So, He can see that there will be a plague of locusts and that this will cause Pharoah distress but that he will still not let Moses' people go.
But how can God be absolutely certain that Pharoah won't change his mind? Because we only get once chance to make the right choice. God may give us plenty of choices to make, but we only get one chance per choice. Time does not move backwards for us. Ever. And every choice we make is inviolate. It can not be undone. It can not be altered after the fact. Every step we take is forward, never backwards.
Because if we could go back and undo a choice we made, if we could "redo" our bad decisions, then we could alter and undo everything that's already been done. We could, in essence, make a liar of God's omniscience. And when the locust plague didn't show up as God had said it would, we would show God to be a fake.
But since we know that God is all knowing and all powerful, we also know that this can not be done. That nothing and no one can undo what God has done, except God.
Therefore, time travel - or more specifically, time travel that allows for interaction with and the possibility of alteration of the past - is not possible. Free will is still free will... but it only goes in one direction.
You may now start the Nobel Committee letter writing campaign and I promise to humbly accept my award next year on behalf of the blogosphere.
Thank you.
A Scholarly Treatise of Immense Religious And Scientific Importance!
Read It Now And Nominate Me For Whatever Nobel Prize I Deserve!
Okay, maybe its not all that hype worthy, because it depends so much on faith and not a whole lot on science, except that if you believe one, then the other must follow.
Here's how it all begins - Exodus, Chapter (10-11, somewhere in there). God through Moses through Aaron baits Pharoah - let my people go or... fill in nasty plague here. If you don't, then I will surely send a plague of locusts, etc... tomorrow. So, here's the thing that drives me nuts. My NIV Bible tries to explain away this judgment from God as making perfectly logical sense based on the time of year, the previous plague and other atmospheric data, and, the tendency of locusts, flies, floods, etc... to occur in Egypt all the time. As if it were that simple. But then it occurs to me, okay - even if that were the case, how did God know that such a plague would occur at precisely that time? And if it was going to occur naturally anyway, what if Pharoah had said, "Okay, you win. Take your people and go?" Would God have been able to stop a naturally occuring plague from striking if all He was doing was looking into the future and seeing something that was going to happen anyway? But if God knew what was going to happen in the future, what does that do with our free will? Questions without answers, it seems, until I finally figured something out.
The key to the whole thing is that we were made in God's image. God gave us free will, but God never claimed that He didn't also have free will. You've got free will, but doesn't it feel like sometimes you have no choice but to do X even though you don't want to? Other people can, one by one, strip you of your options until you only have one choice that day. Its either do X or die. But you still have Free Will. You can always choose to die - you still have that other choice. So if, with our own free will, we can limit the choices of others to the point where they only have one real option left to them - i.e. do what we want them to do - then why can't we also prescribe to God the exact same ability?
Add to this ability of free will is God's omniscience. He knows everything, he sees everything, and he knows how its all going to come out. God can see the future and He can rig it so that all the good people win and all the bad people lose by using His free will to subtly make things so that you have a very limited number of choices (good or bad, right or wrong, God or... oblivion). Ultimately, its up to you to make that choice. Ultimately, you have free will - even if the choice you're going to make is known by God in advance.
Pharoah could choose to let the Hebrews go at any time he wants, but God already knows that Pharoah won't until after Passover. He's looked ahead and seen what's coming in Chapter 12 even while we're back at Chapter 5. So, He can see that there will be a plague of locusts and that this will cause Pharoah distress but that he will still not let Moses' people go.
But how can God be absolutely certain that Pharoah won't change his mind? Because we only get once chance to make the right choice. God may give us plenty of choices to make, but we only get one chance per choice. Time does not move backwards for us. Ever. And every choice we make is inviolate. It can not be undone. It can not be altered after the fact. Every step we take is forward, never backwards.
Because if we could go back and undo a choice we made, if we could "redo" our bad decisions, then we could alter and undo everything that's already been done. We could, in essence, make a liar of God's omniscience. And when the locust plague didn't show up as God had said it would, we would show God to be a fake.
But since we know that God is all knowing and all powerful, we also know that this can not be done. That nothing and no one can undo what God has done, except God.
Therefore, time travel - or more specifically, time travel that allows for interaction with and the possibility of alteration of the past - is not possible. Free will is still free will... but it only goes in one direction.
You may now start the Nobel Committee letter writing campaign and I promise to humbly accept my award next year on behalf of the blogosphere.
Thank you.
Wednesday, November 21, 2007
Thankful For Mud and Crud
My sister's excellent Thanksgiving blog (at Superstar) kind of stole my thunder because she summed up what it is to be truly thankful in these hard times - to thank God for kids and family and job and health and all those other things. Its not that I'm not thankful for those things, although I admit to sometimes taking them for granted, its just that when I look back on this year I find myself being thankful for mud and for crud more than for happiness and health.
Its great, of course, to be happy and healthy, but if you're lost in the woods of life, happiness and health are overrated commodities - especially when you don't even realize that you're lost. Sometimes we should be thankful for just as many wrong turns as we should be thankful for the right ones.
So my list of thankful moments begins with Mud - particularly the mud of Westminster Woods just a few weeks ago when I was trudging around trying to build a playground in the rain. Why would I be thankful for mud? Wouldn't a nice bright sunshiny day have been more pleasant? Absolutely, but when you want to be reminded what being truly alive and doing God's work is really like, a little mud adds that je ne sais quot touch (colloquial French increases the educational level of this blog, right?), that divine layer of authenticism. Wallowing in the mud is such a metaphor for what we must do in order to be effective for God that its almost as subtle as being hit over the head with a crowbar, maul or... uh, whatever that other tool was. It was also fun. Lots of fun. And a great and wonderful reminder of what fun it is to embrace nature. So, I am particularly thankful for Mud this year.
Not that Crud takes a back seat to anyone. I dealt with a great deal of it this year - from a minor painful issue with my brother to a blow up at church with a friend to a serious setback in Film school. Each time I was reminded that I am not special, that I am not above causing pain, and that I have a great deal to remember in being a good Christian and a good person. When we don't interact socially, we aren't refined the way we need to be - our edges get a little sharp and brittle. Dealing with other people tends to shake up our view of the world and helps us blunt the sharp edges and become more rounded individuals and better Christians. Every time I'm hit in the face with the Zoo Monkey Crud of life, I take a step back, shocked, and then wipe the stink from my face. I don't always throw the crud, but I'm always close enough to be hit by it. It always stinks. It always stings. It always leaves a stain. But it always leaves me a little better at dodging it the next time. Getting hit with crud is God's way of refining us and reminding us that our crud does stink too. So I am thankful for crud and say, "Bring it on!"
Oh, and maybe its a good idea to roll down a window...
May you all be prepared to dodge the crud and embrace the mud this weekend.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Its great, of course, to be happy and healthy, but if you're lost in the woods of life, happiness and health are overrated commodities - especially when you don't even realize that you're lost. Sometimes we should be thankful for just as many wrong turns as we should be thankful for the right ones.
So my list of thankful moments begins with Mud - particularly the mud of Westminster Woods just a few weeks ago when I was trudging around trying to build a playground in the rain. Why would I be thankful for mud? Wouldn't a nice bright sunshiny day have been more pleasant? Absolutely, but when you want to be reminded what being truly alive and doing God's work is really like, a little mud adds that je ne sais quot touch (colloquial French increases the educational level of this blog, right?), that divine layer of authenticism. Wallowing in the mud is such a metaphor for what we must do in order to be effective for God that its almost as subtle as being hit over the head with a crowbar, maul or... uh, whatever that other tool was. It was also fun. Lots of fun. And a great and wonderful reminder of what fun it is to embrace nature. So, I am particularly thankful for Mud this year.
Not that Crud takes a back seat to anyone. I dealt with a great deal of it this year - from a minor painful issue with my brother to a blow up at church with a friend to a serious setback in Film school. Each time I was reminded that I am not special, that I am not above causing pain, and that I have a great deal to remember in being a good Christian and a good person. When we don't interact socially, we aren't refined the way we need to be - our edges get a little sharp and brittle. Dealing with other people tends to shake up our view of the world and helps us blunt the sharp edges and become more rounded individuals and better Christians. Every time I'm hit in the face with the Zoo Monkey Crud of life, I take a step back, shocked, and then wipe the stink from my face. I don't always throw the crud, but I'm always close enough to be hit by it. It always stinks. It always stings. It always leaves a stain. But it always leaves me a little better at dodging it the next time. Getting hit with crud is God's way of refining us and reminding us that our crud does stink too. So I am thankful for crud and say, "Bring it on!"
Oh, and maybe its a good idea to roll down a window...
May you all be prepared to dodge the crud and embrace the mud this weekend.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
There's never enough happiness
In which your humble correspondent explains to you the secret of happiness...
As a writer, I am fueled by happiness. No, not the mind tripping, day at Disneyland variety, but the average run of the mill everything is running smoothly variety. I have never been able to work when I am sad or angry or just bothered - hot or cold. In order for me to go visit my writer's place, I need to be sure that the regular world is going along just fine.
And so, it occurred to me as a passing fancy the other day, that if I could only just be happy all the time, then I could get a lot more writing done.
Phhfft! Fat chance!
Other than living off a steady supply of prozac or other narcotics, there is absolutely no way to be happy all the time... or is there? As human beings, we have been searching for the source of true happiness since time began. We have tried love, money, drugs, magic, religion, and all sorts of other remedies, but we've never quite gotten that one thing that is the source of true happiness. True and lasting happiness doesn't exist, does it?
So what chance did I have in finding true happiness if nobody ever had enough happiness for themselves. Happiness, then, being a commodity that we all like to hoard for ourselves and we can never get enough of it. And that was when I made a breakthrough and discovered the secret.
We can't be happy all the time because true happiness can only be given, not received.
Think about it. What have you done in your life that guaranteed you happiness? Nothing. Not one thing. You have been happy in the past, sure, but where did that happiness come from? Someone else. If it was that pony that you wanted as a child, that your grandpa gave to you as a birthday present, suddenly you were extremely happy. Did you get the pony yourself? No. Had you gotten the pony yourself, would you have been happy? Probably not, unless the struggle to earn the pony made you feel that you were lucky to have it - that someone or something had provided it for you. So happiness can only be given, and the only way to get happiness is to have it given to you.
So, how do you get enough happiness to last a life time? You give it out as much as possible. The more you give, the more you receive.
Darn, that God was sure clever to invent a system like that, virtually guaranteeing that we would be nice to each other... if only to be nice to ourselves.
As a writer, I am fueled by happiness. No, not the mind tripping, day at Disneyland variety, but the average run of the mill everything is running smoothly variety. I have never been able to work when I am sad or angry or just bothered - hot or cold. In order for me to go visit my writer's place, I need to be sure that the regular world is going along just fine.
And so, it occurred to me as a passing fancy the other day, that if I could only just be happy all the time, then I could get a lot more writing done.
Phhfft! Fat chance!
Other than living off a steady supply of prozac or other narcotics, there is absolutely no way to be happy all the time... or is there? As human beings, we have been searching for the source of true happiness since time began. We have tried love, money, drugs, magic, religion, and all sorts of other remedies, but we've never quite gotten that one thing that is the source of true happiness. True and lasting happiness doesn't exist, does it?
So what chance did I have in finding true happiness if nobody ever had enough happiness for themselves. Happiness, then, being a commodity that we all like to hoard for ourselves and we can never get enough of it. And that was when I made a breakthrough and discovered the secret.
We can't be happy all the time because true happiness can only be given, not received.
Think about it. What have you done in your life that guaranteed you happiness? Nothing. Not one thing. You have been happy in the past, sure, but where did that happiness come from? Someone else. If it was that pony that you wanted as a child, that your grandpa gave to you as a birthday present, suddenly you were extremely happy. Did you get the pony yourself? No. Had you gotten the pony yourself, would you have been happy? Probably not, unless the struggle to earn the pony made you feel that you were lucky to have it - that someone or something had provided it for you. So happiness can only be given, and the only way to get happiness is to have it given to you.
So, how do you get enough happiness to last a life time? You give it out as much as possible. The more you give, the more you receive.
Darn, that God was sure clever to invent a system like that, virtually guaranteeing that we would be nice to each other... if only to be nice to ourselves.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Pop Quiz, Round Two Answers
Because I know you've been waiting for this all week...
1) C
2) C
3) D
4) D
5) B
6) C
7) A
8) B
9) E
10)D
1) C
2) C
3) D
4) D
5) B
6) C
7) A
8) B
9) E
10)D
Thursday, November 15, 2007
This blog thingy
See Will blog. Will blogs well. Will blogs fast. Blog is easy to read. Blog is fun. Blog, Will, blog.
(Apparently, this blog is not erudite enough to qualify for the higher echelons of our educational system. While a paradigm shift could be attempted, I do not like to acknowledge the obvious social stratification that is rigidly enforced by such a maneuver. Besides, I like to keep all the big words for my Novel - where I get paid for them. ;)
(Apparently, this blog is not erudite enough to qualify for the higher echelons of our educational system. While a paradigm shift could be attempted, I do not like to acknowledge the obvious social stratification that is rigidly enforced by such a maneuver. Besides, I like to keep all the big words for my Novel - where I get paid for them. ;)
First a little geography lesson for Disney
A Magical Journey Begins for 100 High School Students Headed to Disney's Dreamers Academy
Walt Disney World Resort and Celebrity Radio Personality Steve Harvey Announce Participants
(November 14, 2007) Walt Disney World Resort will open the doors of the magic behind Disney to 100 creative and imaginative teens from New York to New Orleans, from Compton, CA., to Wichita, that is, from all across the United States, who have been selected to participate in Disney's Dreamers Academy. Disney worked with nationally syndicated radio personality Steve Harvey to create this innovative program.
Okay, so I checked out the list. Fortunately, with 100 participants its easy to do the stats. So how does their participant breakdown work for the United States? A full 6% of the people on the list come from the Western United States - and every single one of them comes from a city in southern California within 100 miles of Anaheim. So basically, all around the United States translates into the east coast and LA.
It's bad enough taking this biased view of the US from sports writers, but do we have to endure it from corporate giants like Disney as well. 6 people west of the Mississippi represent over half the nation. Pathetic.
First thing they should teach these kids is some geography. Who knows? Maybe they'll learn something themselves.
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